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Finding Me
Goodreads Choice Award
Nominee for Best Memoir & Autobiography (2022)In my book, you will meet a little girl named Viola who ran from her past until she made a life-changing decision to stop running forever.
This is my story, from a crumbling apartment in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to the stage in New York City, and beyond. This is the path I took to finding my purpose but also my voice in a world that didn’t always see me.
As I wrote Finding Me, my eyes were open to the truth of how our stories are often not given close examination. We are forced to reinvent them to fit into a crazy, competitive, judgmental world. So I wrote this for anyone running through life untethered, desperate and clawing their way through murky memories, trying to get to some form of self-love. For anyone who needs reminding that a life worth living can only be born from radical honesty and the courage to shed facades and be . . . you.
Finding Me is a deep reflection, a promise, and a love letter of sorts to self. My hope is that my story will inspire you to light up your own life with creative expression and rediscover who you were before the world put a label on you.
This is my story, from a crumbling apartment in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to the stage in New York City, and beyond. This is the path I took to finding my purpose but also my voice in a world that didn’t always see me.
As I wrote Finding Me, my eyes were open to the truth of how our stories are often not given close examination. We are forced to reinvent them to fit into a crazy, competitive, judgmental world. So I wrote this for anyone running through life untethered, desperate and clawing their way through murky memories, trying to get to some form of self-love. For anyone who needs reminding that a life worth living can only be born from radical honesty and the courage to shed facades and be . . . you.
Finding Me is a deep reflection, a promise, and a love letter of sorts to self. My hope is that my story will inspire you to light up your own life with creative expression and rediscover who you were before the world put a label on you.
304 pages, Hardcover
First published April 26, 2022
About the author
Viola Davis
10 books851 followersLibrarian Note: There is more than one author by this name in the Goodreads database.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 15,477 reviews
June 21, 2023
This has got to be my favorite read of the year. I loved Viola Davis before, but now I’m IN love with her. The immense respect and admiration I have for her is deep. The things she endured as a kid, teen, woman—period. I can honestly say that I’ve never experienced. I’ve never missed a meal for days. I’ve never had to lie in my own urine and go to school the next day reeking. I’ve never had to fight with huge rats over my bed & pillow. I’ve never witness my father beat my mom within an inch of her life and I’ve never experienced racism on the level that Viola has for being too dark. What she went through for being dark skinned, what her mom went through as a child..absolutely horrific.
“Memories are immortal. They’re deathless and precise. They have the power of giving you joy and perspective in hard times. Or, they can strangle you. Define you in a way that’s based more in other people’s tucked-up perceptions than truth.”
The colorism she experienced in the acting world and how they tried to “mold and shape” her into the perfect “white” actor. I love how she explained what Shonda Rhimes did for her in creating HTGAWM role for her and the healing that came from that. “Annalise Keating released in me the obstacles blocking me from realizing my worth and power as a woman.”
“As Black women, we are complicated. We are feminine. We are sexual. We are beautiful. We’re pretty. There are people out there who desire us. We are deserving. So that’s why I’m very aware of what my presence means. And that’s why I’m also aware of why I need to be emotionally healthy. Because that’s a lot of responsibility. Because you’re coming up against a four-hundred-year-old narrative.”
How to Get Away with Murder was where my radical transformation took place. In the course of playing Annalise, I understood that I was no longer and never was that ugly Black nigga. The role liberated me. I said to myself: All I’ve got is me. And that is enough.
“Memories are immortal. They’re deathless and precise. They have the power of giving you joy and perspective in hard times. Or, they can strangle you. Define you in a way that’s based more in other people’s tucked-up perceptions than truth.”
The colorism she experienced in the acting world and how they tried to “mold and shape” her into the perfect “white” actor. I love how she explained what Shonda Rhimes did for her in creating HTGAWM role for her and the healing that came from that. “Annalise Keating released in me the obstacles blocking me from realizing my worth and power as a woman.”
“As Black women, we are complicated. We are feminine. We are sexual. We are beautiful. We’re pretty. There are people out there who desire us. We are deserving. So that’s why I’m very aware of what my presence means. And that’s why I’m also aware of why I need to be emotionally healthy. Because that’s a lot of responsibility. Because you’re coming up against a four-hundred-year-old narrative.”
How to Get Away with Murder was where my radical transformation took place. In the course of playing Annalise, I understood that I was no longer and never was that ugly Black nigga. The role liberated me. I said to myself: All I’ve got is me. And that is enough.
February 27, 2023
Viola Davis is one of the best actors of this generation and has won multiple awards in acting, like Oscar, Emmy, and Tony. She tells her extraordinary journey filled with poverty, love, hatred, racism, and achievements in her life in this book.
What I learned from this book
1) What was the biggest discovery in Viola Davis's life?
We have seen many people going into a shell and not peaking to their full potential if they have a major setback in their life. Viola Davis teaches us how to tackle a situation that she considers the biggest discovery in her life.
“My biggest discovery was that you can literally re-create your life. You can redefine it. You don't have to live in the past."
2) Jim Crow laws and African American women
The term Jim Crow originated from a minstrel show in 1828 which was projecting African Americans negatively. The racial segregation and black codes caused by these laws made it difficult for African Americans to access public transportation, schools, cast votes, and even gain economic independence. The civil rights movement helped to end the Jim Crow era.
Black people, particularly women, were projected in a terrible manner by the Jim Crow laws. The author is discussing the pain that she had to suffer due to the mindset of people due to the influence of the Jim Crow laws.
“I am a dark-skinned woman. Culturally, there is a spoken and unspoken narrative rooted in Jim Crow. It tells us that dark-skinned women are simply not desirable. All the attributes that are attached to being a woman-desirable, vulnerable, needing to be rescued-don't apply to us. In the past, we've been used as chattel, fodder for inhumane experimentation, and it has evolved into invisibility."
3) What is the most important quality needed for an artist?
Viola Davis is an actor who succeeded with her hard work, determination, and passion. She tells us how to become a good artist through this book.
"First ingredient I needed to be an artist, the power to create. The power of alchemy, that magical process of transformation and creation to believe at any given time I could be the somebody I always wanted to be."
My favourite three lines from this book
“I knew my life would be a fight, and I realized this: I had it in me.”
“The TV and film business is saturated with people who think they're writing something human when it's really a gimmick.”
"I now understand that life and living it is more about being present. I'm now aware that the not-so-happy memories lie in wait; but the hope and the joy also lie in wait."
What could have been better?
Nobody will forget the powerful words she told during the #metoomovement.
"Our bodies are not the 'spoils of war'… a trophy to be collected to fuel your ego. It's OURS!!! It doesn't belong to you!! And when you take it without permission, it DESTROYS…… like a virus!!!"
"To the predators.. Weinstein, the stranger, the relative, the boyfriend…. I say to you, 'You can choose your sin but you don't get to choose the consequences.' To the victims…. I see you. I believe you… and I'm listening."
In this book, she had an amazing opportunity to discuss the #metoo movement more in-depth as she was one of the few to publicly raise her voice against Harvey Weinstein. She was the apt person to explain more about the movement as she is familiar with almost every piece of information and every victim related to it. She could have given a little more space for the #metoo movement in this book which would have influenced victims and every individual reading this memoir in an inspiring manner, like the impact she made with her inspiring words in the initial part of the movement.
I can't see any other problems apart from this in this memoir, as she has flawlessly written it.
Rating
5/5 This memoir will make you emotional after reading the author's extraordinary life journey. If you are facing many obstacles in your life now and want to read a newly published inspirational book, this book will be a great choice.
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May 30, 2022
Audiobook…read by Viola Davis
……9 hours and 15 minutes
I hope everyone is enjoying a healthy happy Memorial Day weekend. Paul and I are.
Sometimes we just want more time to bask in the experience of a magnificent book —- of an magnificent human being - a powerful Black Woman….unbelievable stories…
….this ‘basking’ is one of those times.
I will sit down and put some thoughts together tomorrow….
But for now…..
I can’t recommend this audiobook more.
I’M BACK… Update:
Viola Davis had a story to tell….carved from experiences that shaped who she is. Trying to fully understand her ‘entire’ life story and ‘how’ she survived unfathomable traumatic conditions—for years—as a child —is staggering…..
…..from unbelievable - devastating - insane - crazy - horrific - very abusive childhood conditions…..
Readers will wonder…..why, WHY didn’t ‘anyone’ help? Where the hell were child services?
But……
Viola was not venting her anger, airing her wounds, asking for pity or going after revenge……
Instead she simply tells the facts - the truth - the ugly stories — unapologetic stories from early childhood to present day.
It’s no accident that Time Magazine named Viola Davis one of the 100 most influential people in the world.
More to say about “Finding Me”……
It’s PHENOMENAL!!!! ….as in EXTREMELY and EXTRAORDINARY mesmerizing…..
…..one of the most impactful audiobooks I’ve ever listened to in my life!!!!!! (seriously!)
I’m baffled at just how powerful — brutal - heart wrenching- heartbreaking - heart stopping - and deeply, profoundly ‘soul’-generous Viola Davis is…..in ‘telling all’.
….From poverty and hardships like you’ve never heard……..
….From shyness, shame and unworthiness….
….From unbelievable abuse both at home and in life…
….To the lioness hard working kick ass, talented, determined, authentic powerhouse inspiring human being…..
….Viola Davis is one of the most remarkable persons on the planet.
“Finding Me”…..is a mind-blowing-explosive memoir.
A couple of times, I tried not to cry - but failed. I cried a ‘few’ times.
My tears came when things were getting ‘better’.
I was more in shock when things were bad.
My only regret- I have from listening to Viola read ‘this/her’ memoir so brilliantly—is that I wish I had been part of a small book group -having ongoing discussions—chapter by chapter.
Paul listened to ‘parts’ - but not all of this book —-(he and I had several conversations—but he missed a lot of poignant parts)….
In my opinion— there is not a word wasted - a tale told that doesn’t have a purpose—
Note…
I’m going to go crazy if I try to say here all the things I really want to say…..and readers who are kind enough to read this review will go nuts if I ‘do’ write all I have to say….(so I’ll never succeed)….
But/And/So…….
I am reminded…..
……why - in community - readers & reviewers - can each contribute to each other by bringing up tidbits in ‘each’ of our different reviews…..WE All HELP each other out. Many times another reviewer will express in words….
….our deepest experiences — to fit ours — words we were lacking in accessibility at the time ourselves……( so we need each other to draw out different aspects of books we cherish)
This book needs MANY readers. We need to examine, explore, scrutinize, question, contemplate, dig deep, chew, study, and appraise…..[together-as-community]….a book like this: to be clear …’This Book’: Viola Davis’s memoir. Many lessons - insights - to take away.
Much to learn, reflect, and think about. I’m guessing every reader will continue thinking about this book long after finishing it - certain sections more than others (all for varied reasons)….
After getting past the early(nightmare) childhood years —-Viola began her career (so damn interesting of even how she got from A to B), in Central Falls, Rhode Island….
….Viola had me ‘hanging-by-a-tread’ when she took a 4 hour train ride — to audition - to get into Juilliard ….
OMG….what a story!
And a COMPLETE story ( gets better and better)….
from the audition process - to attending the damn school as a BLACK women who felt she was being asked to HIDE her BLACKNESS— to fit in.
It’s an AMAZING story …..KICK-ASS - cheer-for story …..
during a time when Viola had an opportunity to spend a semester in Africa……
ONE OF MY FAVORITE sections of this book….
….Viola had a chance to practice her craft and learn from the African tribes….(women and blackness was worshiped).
I wanted to stand up - cheer - laugh - scream - cry - ‘root-for- Viola….
I wanted to celebrate her joy, her eye-opening insights….her passion….her love…her loyalty to truth….to integrity….her authenticity…..her boldness, bravery, and discovery into FINDING HERSELF…
Sisterhood in Africa among black women went deep. And here Viola was coming from her school, Juilliard, where she was being classically trained to MAKE EVERY EFFORT to MAKE HER BLACKNESS DISAPPEAR! (shame on the teachers)….
In Africa. …..dark black skin was unapologetically beautiful.
A breakthrough was beginning….
TONS more inspiring tales…..
….Explore themes about ‘temporary’ love (incredibly quality truths)
….Explore….
poverty, extreme hunger, no heat, no running water, frozen pipes, rats, mice, filth, urine smells, thrift clothes, emotional, physical, mental, spiritual trauma, fighting to survive, hopes, dreams, the desire to GO TO SCHOOL, to excel in school, older sister inspiration, racism, blackness, sexism, struggles throughout, white privileges, hard work, training, goals, blessings, deprivations, family, parents, siblings, feelings of worth, fears, responsibilities (“if you make it out…you go back and pull everybody else out”), love, rejection, more love, more rejection, marriage, kids, career highlights (theater, Broadway, movies, TV series, artists, actors, community & camaraderie pride), loneliness, isolation, disillusionments, awkwardness, illness, embarrassments, acceptance, awards, transformation, forgiveness, death, love, therapy, ….
EMOTIONAL HEALTH IS NECESSARY….
….a little luck (impossible without the work), ‘very’ interesting details about the BUSINESS of being a working actor ….
[I know much of these facts - our 40 year old daughter is a steady working actor in Hollywood since childhood]…..
But it was soooo rewarding for me to have Viola spell out the nitty-gritty truths.
People are ignorant- when they negatively bash Hollywood actors — generalize, and lumped everything into their own assumptions.
Viola spells the beans on what the inner circle knows — it’s WORK.
….. only 4% of those in the sag union make enough money to even qualify to take out medical insurance.
And once in a blue moon - it feels like a miracle happened.
As Whoopi Goldberg once said…..
“I’ve been bad a lot. I’ve been good sometimes, and I have been great just a few times”.
When Viola shares her ‘golden’ moments….
….not just winning an Emmy, a Tony nomination, a Golden Globe award, screen actors Guild award, a star on the Hollywood walk of fame, an Academy award for best supporting actress….etc. etc….
Or…
one of the highest rewards: being inducted into the “Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences”…..
but
HER authentic FEELING ALIVE moments (such as working on “Seven Guitars”….filming “”Fences….and that “Broadway” really is as grand as dreamed ….and the growth & gift to filming “How to Get Away With Murder” series …..respecting the real craft of artistry ….relationships….(no longer ashamed for who she is)….
it’s totally wonderfully remarkable to celebrate this outstanding woman.
Paul and I haven’t even finished the first season of “How to Get Away With Murder”, yet….we are late to watch it….but we are loving it …….
……even ‘more’ — since listening to this book.
IT’S SUCH a JOY to share in PURITY and HUMANITY of who Viola Davis is.
……9 hours and 15 minutes
I hope everyone is enjoying a healthy happy Memorial Day weekend. Paul and I are.
Sometimes we just want more time to bask in the experience of a magnificent book —- of an magnificent human being - a powerful Black Woman….unbelievable stories…
….this ‘basking’ is one of those times.
I will sit down and put some thoughts together tomorrow….
But for now…..
I can’t recommend this audiobook more.
I’M BACK… Update:
Viola Davis had a story to tell….carved from experiences that shaped who she is. Trying to fully understand her ‘entire’ life story and ‘how’ she survived unfathomable traumatic conditions—for years—as a child —is staggering…..
…..from unbelievable - devastating - insane - crazy - horrific - very abusive childhood conditions…..
Readers will wonder…..why, WHY didn’t ‘anyone’ help? Where the hell were child services?
But……
Viola was not venting her anger, airing her wounds, asking for pity or going after revenge……
Instead she simply tells the facts - the truth - the ugly stories — unapologetic stories from early childhood to present day.
It’s no accident that Time Magazine named Viola Davis one of the 100 most influential people in the world.
More to say about “Finding Me”……
It’s PHENOMENAL!!!! ….as in EXTREMELY and EXTRAORDINARY mesmerizing…..
…..one of the most impactful audiobooks I’ve ever listened to in my life!!!!!! (seriously!)
I’m baffled at just how powerful — brutal - heart wrenching- heartbreaking - heart stopping - and deeply, profoundly ‘soul’-generous Viola Davis is…..in ‘telling all’.
….From poverty and hardships like you’ve never heard……..
….From shyness, shame and unworthiness….
….From unbelievable abuse both at home and in life…
….To the lioness hard working kick ass, talented, determined, authentic powerhouse inspiring human being…..
….Viola Davis is one of the most remarkable persons on the planet.
“Finding Me”…..is a mind-blowing-explosive memoir.
A couple of times, I tried not to cry - but failed. I cried a ‘few’ times.
My tears came when things were getting ‘better’.
I was more in shock when things were bad.
My only regret- I have from listening to Viola read ‘this/her’ memoir so brilliantly—is that I wish I had been part of a small book group -having ongoing discussions—chapter by chapter.
Paul listened to ‘parts’ - but not all of this book —-(he and I had several conversations—but he missed a lot of poignant parts)….
In my opinion— there is not a word wasted - a tale told that doesn’t have a purpose—
Note…
I’m going to go crazy if I try to say here all the things I really want to say…..and readers who are kind enough to read this review will go nuts if I ‘do’ write all I have to say….(so I’ll never succeed)….
But/And/So…….
I am reminded…..
……why - in community - readers & reviewers - can each contribute to each other by bringing up tidbits in ‘each’ of our different reviews…..WE All HELP each other out. Many times another reviewer will express in words….
….our deepest experiences — to fit ours — words we were lacking in accessibility at the time ourselves……( so we need each other to draw out different aspects of books we cherish)
This book needs MANY readers. We need to examine, explore, scrutinize, question, contemplate, dig deep, chew, study, and appraise…..[together-as-community]….a book like this: to be clear …’This Book’: Viola Davis’s memoir. Many lessons - insights - to take away.
Much to learn, reflect, and think about. I’m guessing every reader will continue thinking about this book long after finishing it - certain sections more than others (all for varied reasons)….
After getting past the early(nightmare) childhood years —-Viola began her career (so damn interesting of even how she got from A to B), in Central Falls, Rhode Island….
….Viola had me ‘hanging-by-a-tread’ when she took a 4 hour train ride — to audition - to get into Juilliard ….
OMG….what a story!
And a COMPLETE story ( gets better and better)….
from the audition process - to attending the damn school as a BLACK women who felt she was being asked to HIDE her BLACKNESS— to fit in.
It’s an AMAZING story …..KICK-ASS - cheer-for story …..
during a time when Viola had an opportunity to spend a semester in Africa……
ONE OF MY FAVORITE sections of this book….
….Viola had a chance to practice her craft and learn from the African tribes….(women and blackness was worshiped).
I wanted to stand up - cheer - laugh - scream - cry - ‘root-for- Viola….
I wanted to celebrate her joy, her eye-opening insights….her passion….her love…her loyalty to truth….to integrity….her authenticity…..her boldness, bravery, and discovery into FINDING HERSELF…
Sisterhood in Africa among black women went deep. And here Viola was coming from her school, Juilliard, where she was being classically trained to MAKE EVERY EFFORT to MAKE HER BLACKNESS DISAPPEAR! (shame on the teachers)….
In Africa. …..dark black skin was unapologetically beautiful.
A breakthrough was beginning….
TONS more inspiring tales…..
….Explore themes about ‘temporary’ love (incredibly quality truths)
….Explore….
poverty, extreme hunger, no heat, no running water, frozen pipes, rats, mice, filth, urine smells, thrift clothes, emotional, physical, mental, spiritual trauma, fighting to survive, hopes, dreams, the desire to GO TO SCHOOL, to excel in school, older sister inspiration, racism, blackness, sexism, struggles throughout, white privileges, hard work, training, goals, blessings, deprivations, family, parents, siblings, feelings of worth, fears, responsibilities (“if you make it out…you go back and pull everybody else out”), love, rejection, more love, more rejection, marriage, kids, career highlights (theater, Broadway, movies, TV series, artists, actors, community & camaraderie pride), loneliness, isolation, disillusionments, awkwardness, illness, embarrassments, acceptance, awards, transformation, forgiveness, death, love, therapy, ….
EMOTIONAL HEALTH IS NECESSARY….
….a little luck (impossible without the work), ‘very’ interesting details about the BUSINESS of being a working actor ….
[I know much of these facts - our 40 year old daughter is a steady working actor in Hollywood since childhood]…..
But it was soooo rewarding for me to have Viola spell out the nitty-gritty truths.
People are ignorant- when they negatively bash Hollywood actors — generalize, and lumped everything into their own assumptions.
Viola spells the beans on what the inner circle knows — it’s WORK.
….. only 4% of those in the sag union make enough money to even qualify to take out medical insurance.
And once in a blue moon - it feels like a miracle happened.
As Whoopi Goldberg once said…..
“I’ve been bad a lot. I’ve been good sometimes, and I have been great just a few times”.
When Viola shares her ‘golden’ moments….
….not just winning an Emmy, a Tony nomination, a Golden Globe award, screen actors Guild award, a star on the Hollywood walk of fame, an Academy award for best supporting actress….etc. etc….
Or…
one of the highest rewards: being inducted into the “Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences”…..
but
HER authentic FEELING ALIVE moments (such as working on “Seven Guitars”….filming “”Fences….and that “Broadway” really is as grand as dreamed ….and the growth & gift to filming “How to Get Away With Murder” series …..respecting the real craft of artistry ….relationships….(no longer ashamed for who she is)….
it’s totally wonderfully remarkable to celebrate this outstanding woman.
Paul and I haven’t even finished the first season of “How to Get Away With Murder”, yet….we are late to watch it….but we are loving it …….
……even ‘more’ — since listening to this book.
IT’S SUCH a JOY to share in PURITY and HUMANITY of who Viola Davis is.
October 8, 2022
Finding Me by Viola Davis is a 2022 Harper One Publication.
What an amazing memoir! Viola is one of my favorite actresses- but I knew very little about her private life. This book was a huge surprise to me. I was absolutely riveted to both the e-book and the audiobook. I honestly have no words- One simply must experience this memoir for themselves to truly appreciate it.
This must be one of the most straightforward and brutally honest memoirs I have had the pleasure of reading. Viola’s childhood was tough- and it wasn’t just that her family was poor- but that she lived in a home where substance abuse and violence prevailed.
The descriptions of the living conditions of her home are hard to wrap one’s head around, but despite her parents having their hands full with their own demons, Viola managed to get some support from siblings and programs offered to her which helped to build her self-esteem, incentivized her to change the course of her life, propelling her toward achieving her dreams.
The journey wasn’t an easy one- but my goodness was a ride it has been. Viola- I am so happy that you are full of self- love now- that you know how beautiful and talented you are, and I hope you know what an inspiration you are, as well.
Overall, Viola is such a strong woman, but she also shares her struggles and vulnerabilities, and how she made it to this point of stability, peace and understanding.
I love the way she handles her success. She’s humble, practical, and handles criticism stoically and with pragmatism, and that is not something many people are able to pull off in general, much less publicly. I have loved this actress for a long time based solely on her skills as an actress, but now I am doubly impressed. Now when I see Viola on the big or small screen, I will see her in a different light- one that shines brighter and stronger, with an everlasting glow…
This one gets my rare ‘highly recommended’ stamp of approval!
What an amazing memoir! Viola is one of my favorite actresses- but I knew very little about her private life. This book was a huge surprise to me. I was absolutely riveted to both the e-book and the audiobook. I honestly have no words- One simply must experience this memoir for themselves to truly appreciate it.
This must be one of the most straightforward and brutally honest memoirs I have had the pleasure of reading. Viola’s childhood was tough- and it wasn’t just that her family was poor- but that she lived in a home where substance abuse and violence prevailed.
The descriptions of the living conditions of her home are hard to wrap one’s head around, but despite her parents having their hands full with their own demons, Viola managed to get some support from siblings and programs offered to her which helped to build her self-esteem, incentivized her to change the course of her life, propelling her toward achieving her dreams.
The journey wasn’t an easy one- but my goodness was a ride it has been. Viola- I am so happy that you are full of self- love now- that you know how beautiful and talented you are, and I hope you know what an inspiration you are, as well.
Overall, Viola is such a strong woman, but she also shares her struggles and vulnerabilities, and how she made it to this point of stability, peace and understanding.
I love the way she handles her success. She’s humble, practical, and handles criticism stoically and with pragmatism, and that is not something many people are able to pull off in general, much less publicly. I have loved this actress for a long time based solely on her skills as an actress, but now I am doubly impressed. Now when I see Viola on the big or small screen, I will see her in a different light- one that shines brighter and stronger, with an everlasting glow…
This one gets my rare ‘highly recommended’ stamp of approval!
April 18, 2023
I have always thought Viola Davis is a wonderful actress but after having read this, I think she is a much better person than me - or at least a more forgiving one. The things she went through in her early life! I would be holding grudges forever if I were in her shoes. Viola does the narration for the audiobook, so I highly recommend listening to this one.
June 28, 2022
I thought that I loved Viola Davis before reading this book, but my goodness this book was exceptional in every single way and it made me appreciate her even more. CW: depictions of domestic violence, sexual assault, poverty (poor living condition, hunger, and more), death of loved ones
Finding Me has been on my radar since it first released. One thing about memoirs is that I find them to best consumed via audio if narrated by the author. I absolutely love Davis' voice so I knew instantly that I would need a copy of the audiobook. Unfortunately, I shared the same idea with many people in my area so the wait list for this was quite long at my library. But honestly, it was worth every single moment that I waited. Davis takes readers throughout the course her life from her childhood up until the present moments of her career. If there is anything that I learned from each of these moments, it's that you can never tell what someone has been through by just looking at them. The amount of trauma and pain that Davis describes throughout this book is gut-wrenching. She is a true testament to perseverance while also acknowledging how detrimental it can be to refuse to let go, forgive, and heal from the past.
Davis also explores the complexity of the entertainment industry and how so few actually make it to high levels of fame. There are conversations related to misogyny, racism, and colorism; things that I knew existed in Hollywood, but were still heartbreaking to hear via Davis' experiences. There was also conversation about the treatment of theater versus film which I found to be extremely intriguing. I do not consume either on a large scale so I was unaware of the lack of respect for those that often did theater. I would assume that it wouldn't be that way because most actors seem to begin there; however, based on commentary and financial gains from each I understand the differences more.
Overall, this was a beautiful, heart-wrenching book and I'm so glad that Viola Davis felt comfortable enough to share her story: the good, the bad, and the ugly. I feel so honored to have read a story in which she was so open and vulnerable. I learned a lot about the industry, her very own love story (this was my favorite part...her husband is a catch!), her path to adoption, her family history, and more. Her voice was like liquid gold and as I continued to listen, I felt I needed more and more. If you haven't considered reading this book, I highly recommend it. It's one of the best memoirs I've to date.
Finding Me has been on my radar since it first released. One thing about memoirs is that I find them to best consumed via audio if narrated by the author. I absolutely love Davis' voice so I knew instantly that I would need a copy of the audiobook. Unfortunately, I shared the same idea with many people in my area so the wait list for this was quite long at my library. But honestly, it was worth every single moment that I waited. Davis takes readers throughout the course her life from her childhood up until the present moments of her career. If there is anything that I learned from each of these moments, it's that you can never tell what someone has been through by just looking at them. The amount of trauma and pain that Davis describes throughout this book is gut-wrenching. She is a true testament to perseverance while also acknowledging how detrimental it can be to refuse to let go, forgive, and heal from the past.
Davis also explores the complexity of the entertainment industry and how so few actually make it to high levels of fame. There are conversations related to misogyny, racism, and colorism; things that I knew existed in Hollywood, but were still heartbreaking to hear via Davis' experiences. There was also conversation about the treatment of theater versus film which I found to be extremely intriguing. I do not consume either on a large scale so I was unaware of the lack of respect for those that often did theater. I would assume that it wouldn't be that way because most actors seem to begin there; however, based on commentary and financial gains from each I understand the differences more.
Overall, this was a beautiful, heart-wrenching book and I'm so glad that Viola Davis felt comfortable enough to share her story: the good, the bad, and the ugly. I feel so honored to have read a story in which she was so open and vulnerable. I learned a lot about the industry, her very own love story (this was my favorite part...her husband is a catch!), her path to adoption, her family history, and more. Her voice was like liquid gold and as I continued to listen, I felt I needed more and more. If you haven't considered reading this book, I highly recommend it. It's one of the best memoirs I've to date.
December 5, 2022
Que mulher maravilhosa ❤️
Eu simplesmente devorei esse livro!
Eu simplesmente devorei esse livro!
February 21, 2023
“May you live long enough to know why you were born.” —Cherokee Birth Blessing
Talk about pulling yourself up from your bootstraps! Viola has done her work!
She bravely shares so much. She wants to connect and communicate to the reader what’s it’s like to come from poverty, to live in fear, to fight for your life. She wants you to understand that even winning this fight is not enough, because what matters most is coming to terms with all you’ve been through to experience true freedom. She encourages us to face what is to heal, and takes us through what she had to face. She believes in change, saw it with her own eyes in her father. She does not color rose over childhood glasses — she saw her daddy’s drunken beatings of her mom to within an inch of her life — yet, she can love the man he becomes without punishing him for his past.
This book is a lot of things, and all of them feel genuine Viola. Are you trying to make it as an actor? She tells you the truth. Are you dark skinned? She tells you what she’s seen and what she feels as a dark-skinned Black woman. And after making it out of a life of poverty and into a successful career against the odds, she realizes she doesn’t know how to really love romantically, or how to be intimately loved. So, then she faces that.
I rooted for her the whole way. I can at least say I relate to her work on learning to love. Of all the rest, I wish I had her strength and determination. But I do not wish for her trauma. I’ve always been drawn to her work, and then to her more personally when I saw her share as part of an informal actress’ round table. Both then, and in this book, she felt authentic and soulful. I listened to her read this. She has a powerful voice, in more ways than one.
Talk about pulling yourself up from your bootstraps! Viola has done her work!
She bravely shares so much. She wants to connect and communicate to the reader what’s it’s like to come from poverty, to live in fear, to fight for your life. She wants you to understand that even winning this fight is not enough, because what matters most is coming to terms with all you’ve been through to experience true freedom. She encourages us to face what is to heal, and takes us through what she had to face. She believes in change, saw it with her own eyes in her father. She does not color rose over childhood glasses — she saw her daddy’s drunken beatings of her mom to within an inch of her life — yet, she can love the man he becomes without punishing him for his past.
This book is a lot of things, and all of them feel genuine Viola. Are you trying to make it as an actor? She tells you the truth. Are you dark skinned? She tells you what she’s seen and what she feels as a dark-skinned Black woman. And after making it out of a life of poverty and into a successful career against the odds, she realizes she doesn’t know how to really love romantically, or how to be intimately loved. So, then she faces that.
I rooted for her the whole way. I can at least say I relate to her work on learning to love. Of all the rest, I wish I had her strength and determination. But I do not wish for her trauma. I’ve always been drawn to her work, and then to her more personally when I saw her share as part of an informal actress’ round table. Both then, and in this book, she felt authentic and soulful. I listened to her read this. She has a powerful voice, in more ways than one.
December 3, 2022
4+ stars!
Raw. Honest. Gut wrenching. Shocking. Inspiring.
Viola Davis, producer and Academy Award winning actress, shares her life story. It isn’t pretty. This book is intense, heavy and brutally honest. I found it difficult to read at times. Viola has been through abuse, trauma and tragedy which she openly shares within these pages. Her childhood was traumatic, leaving her with lifelong scars. These scars she recognizes, nurtures, accepts and chooses to learn from and grow from.
One of the many takeaways for me is the understanding of just how hard it is for actors to “make it”. The stats Viola shares about the percentage of actors that make livable wages is surprising. Another huge takeaway for me was her love story and how finding “the one” changed her life forever. He healed her, loved her, supported her, empowered her, accepted all her scars. Unconditional love. I’m not one to enjoy love stories but this was a stand out part of the book that really impacted me.
Audiobook rating: 5+ stars! Viola Davis narrates this herself. I could listen to her voice forever. She added a powerful intensity to this book — it’s one I will never forget listening to. Highly recommend the audio!
Thank you to my lovely local library for the audio loan!
Raw. Honest. Gut wrenching. Shocking. Inspiring.
Viola Davis, producer and Academy Award winning actress, shares her life story. It isn’t pretty. This book is intense, heavy and brutally honest. I found it difficult to read at times. Viola has been through abuse, trauma and tragedy which she openly shares within these pages. Her childhood was traumatic, leaving her with lifelong scars. These scars she recognizes, nurtures, accepts and chooses to learn from and grow from.
One of the many takeaways for me is the understanding of just how hard it is for actors to “make it”. The stats Viola shares about the percentage of actors that make livable wages is surprising. Another huge takeaway for me was her love story and how finding “the one” changed her life forever. He healed her, loved her, supported her, empowered her, accepted all her scars. Unconditional love. I’m not one to enjoy love stories but this was a stand out part of the book that really impacted me.
Audiobook rating: 5+ stars! Viola Davis narrates this herself. I could listen to her voice forever. She added a powerful intensity to this book — it’s one I will never forget listening to. Highly recommend the audio!
Thank you to my lovely local library for the audio loan!
May 1, 2022
Like many people, I discovered Viola from her incredible work on How to Get Away With Murder and have been following her work ever since. So finding out she would be gifting us with a deep memoir of her childhood to her present day life was amazing. It’s always strange to rate non-fiction, especially memoirs, but Viola absolutely killed this. She’s a naturally talented writer and was able to transport me to every event she recalls. From the extreme poverty, the intense physical and sexual abuse, and all the way to Hollywood, Viola paints a perfect image to show you and let you understand her life.
“There is an emotional abandonment that comes with poverty and being Black. The weight of generational trauma and having to fight for your basic needs doesn’t leave room for anything else. You just believe you’re the leftovers.”
Like most readers will probably feel, I thought Viola’s childhood was the most emotional and engaging part of the story. Viola came from absolutely nothing. ‘Po’ as she puts it. Rat invested and pissed soaked beds, emotional and physical abuse, surrounded by and even experiencing sexual abuse, all while growing up as a Black girl in a predominately white area. The name calling from other class mates, the getting chased and beat up, the shame and humility Viola constantly felt, all of it, is absolutely harrowing. The level of courage and bravery needed to overcome some of the things Viola has experienced is extremely high. I feel we should be responsible to listen to her story with open ears and let it all resonate with us because what Viola has written here is so intense and important. She explores several relationships she has involving her family and how those relationships have changed and developed over the years and I just think she did a wonderful job detailing her childhood and how it has affected her later into her career.
“That period of my life was filled with shame. The feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you have stage fright or humiliation, that was the shame of living in 128. Shame completely eviscerates you, destroys any sense of pride you may have in yourself.”
“I was being catapulted into adulthood. Coming from a childhood of trauma, I needed a radical transformation. I hadn’t been taught how to navigate the world. I hadn’t been taught what could help me grow or live better. I’d been taught to run from the world. I’d been taught how to hide and fight. I hadn’t been taught how to love and be still.”
Viola also details the events of her rise to where she is now and like her childhood, it is extremely upsetting but also very inspiring. Growing up without the tools needed to heal from her trauma, Viola struggled a lot throughout her career, From attending Juilliard, to winning her first Tony, and then to winning her first Oscar, Viola carried that broken little girl with her everywhere. The way she writes about trauma and the healing process is so authentic and I think a lot of readers will find so much from Viola’s wisdom. It feels like Viola wrote this book, not just for for herself, but so many people. For young Black girls with big dreams, for people living in intense poverty without a solution to get out, for mothers, for readers struggling to find a place in the world, for so many people. And that’s so commendable that she was able to write a book so personal but it will affect and help so many people. As Oprah said, buy yourself a copy and buy a friend a copy because once you read your gonna want to talk about it. Thank you for this one Viola! Absolutely amazing.
“The question still echoes, how did I claw my way out? There is no out. Every painful memory, every mentor, every friend and foe serves as a chisel, a leap pad that has shaped “ME!” The imperfect but blessed sculpture that is Viola is still growing and being chiseled. My elixir? I’m no longer ashamed of me. I own everything that has ever happened to me. The parts of me that were a source of shame are actually my warrior fuel. I see people-the way they walk, talk, laugh, and grieve, and their silence-in a way that is hyperfocused because of my past. I’m an artist because there‘s no separation from me and every human being that has passed through the world including my mom. I have a great deal of compassion for other people, but mostly for myself. That would not be the case I did not reconcile that little eight-year-old girl and FIND ME. I’m holding her now. My eight-year-old self. Holding her tight. She is squealing and reminding me, “Don’t worry! I’m here to beat anybody’s ass who messes with our joy! Viola, I got this.”
“There is an emotional abandonment that comes with poverty and being Black. The weight of generational trauma and having to fight for your basic needs doesn’t leave room for anything else. You just believe you’re the leftovers.”
Like most readers will probably feel, I thought Viola’s childhood was the most emotional and engaging part of the story. Viola came from absolutely nothing. ‘Po’ as she puts it. Rat invested and pissed soaked beds, emotional and physical abuse, surrounded by and even experiencing sexual abuse, all while growing up as a Black girl in a predominately white area. The name calling from other class mates, the getting chased and beat up, the shame and humility Viola constantly felt, all of it, is absolutely harrowing. The level of courage and bravery needed to overcome some of the things Viola has experienced is extremely high. I feel we should be responsible to listen to her story with open ears and let it all resonate with us because what Viola has written here is so intense and important. She explores several relationships she has involving her family and how those relationships have changed and developed over the years and I just think she did a wonderful job detailing her childhood and how it has affected her later into her career.
“That period of my life was filled with shame. The feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you have stage fright or humiliation, that was the shame of living in 128. Shame completely eviscerates you, destroys any sense of pride you may have in yourself.”
“I was being catapulted into adulthood. Coming from a childhood of trauma, I needed a radical transformation. I hadn’t been taught how to navigate the world. I hadn’t been taught what could help me grow or live better. I’d been taught to run from the world. I’d been taught how to hide and fight. I hadn’t been taught how to love and be still.”
Viola also details the events of her rise to where she is now and like her childhood, it is extremely upsetting but also very inspiring. Growing up without the tools needed to heal from her trauma, Viola struggled a lot throughout her career, From attending Juilliard, to winning her first Tony, and then to winning her first Oscar, Viola carried that broken little girl with her everywhere. The way she writes about trauma and the healing process is so authentic and I think a lot of readers will find so much from Viola’s wisdom. It feels like Viola wrote this book, not just for for herself, but so many people. For young Black girls with big dreams, for people living in intense poverty without a solution to get out, for mothers, for readers struggling to find a place in the world, for so many people. And that’s so commendable that she was able to write a book so personal but it will affect and help so many people. As Oprah said, buy yourself a copy and buy a friend a copy because once you read your gonna want to talk about it. Thank you for this one Viola! Absolutely amazing.
“The question still echoes, how did I claw my way out? There is no out. Every painful memory, every mentor, every friend and foe serves as a chisel, a leap pad that has shaped “ME!” The imperfect but blessed sculpture that is Viola is still growing and being chiseled. My elixir? I’m no longer ashamed of me. I own everything that has ever happened to me. The parts of me that were a source of shame are actually my warrior fuel. I see people-the way they walk, talk, laugh, and grieve, and their silence-in a way that is hyperfocused because of my past. I’m an artist because there‘s no separation from me and every human being that has passed through the world including my mom. I have a great deal of compassion for other people, but mostly for myself. That would not be the case I did not reconcile that little eight-year-old girl and FIND ME. I’m holding her now. My eight-year-old self. Holding her tight. She is squealing and reminding me, “Don’t worry! I’m here to beat anybody’s ass who messes with our joy! Viola, I got this.”
December 7, 2022
The question still echoes, how did I claw my way out? There is no out. Every painful memory, every mentor, every friend and foe served as a chisel, a leap pad that has shaped “ME!” The imperfect but blessed sculpture that is Viola is still growing and still being chiseled.
My elixir? I’m no longer ashamed of me.
I'm in actual tears.
Where has this book been my whole life?
I don't usually read non-fiction books, even less if they're biographies, but my amazing best friend and her flawless taste in books thought this was the perfect Christmas gift for me, and it truly was.
I own everything that has ever happened to me. The parts that were a source of shame are actually my warrior fuel. I see people—the way they walk, talk, laugh, and grieve, and their silence—in a way that is hyperfocused because of my past. I’m an artist because there’s no separation from me and every human being that has passed through the world including my mom.
Objectively speaking, Finding Me is a powerful story; it's not an easy one to read, as it's one born in pain and violence. It's the story of a scared child geared up in a warrior armor, of a person who climbed her way out of her own personal hell hole with clenched teeth and an impressive amount of talent.
But thinking about it from the perspective of the entire universe, distilling the novel to its aching soul, it could be the story of many other women, women who still need to make peace with their past, women who struggle to put an end to the abusive streak they're enduring. Women who need to justify their choices and hopes. Women who forgot how to be without bruises and cuts.
That's what makes this book so impactful and that's what makes this world so sick.
It's terribly real, unfortunately so real.
I have a great deal of compassion for other people, but mostly for myself. That would not be the case if I did not reconcile that little eight-year-old girl and FIND ME.
I cried reading about Viola's childhood and the way her trauma shaped her into the woman she is today. I cheered for her, had my heart burn with pride and joy learning she's finally getting the love and life she deserves.
I feel connected to her and to all the women, of any color, of any biological nature, who fight every day for the birthright to be themselves.
I feel understood and lucky and I feel like I should do more to help, to listen, to heal. I feel inspired, emotional and thankful.
So very thankful.
This book really is a gift, in all and for all.
Viola Davis, you beautiful angel full of courage and passion. We don't deserve you.
I’m holding her now. My eight-year-old self. Holding her tight. She is squealing and reminding me, “Don’t worry! I’m here to beat anybody’s ass who messes with our joy! Viola, I got this.”
October 28, 2022
I knew I would love Viola Davis!
Finding Me is a raw and honest memior about growing up in abject poverty with an abusive and alcoholic father. Surviving child sexual abuse/incest and coping with systemic racism to become an Oscar winning actress.
Viola Davis has not had an easy life. Becoming an actress probably saved her life. I mean Viola had to deal with racist bullying from kids at school and when she was in grade school her teacher told her she would never be anything because she's Black. I felt that so intensely because my 3rd grade teacher said that Black people couldn't be doctors or lawyers, so we should focus on trades....this was in the 1990's. These things still happen today as well.
Viola Davis is such a tough woman. She fought through poverty and the racism that Hollywood runs on. I mean even after 2 Oscar nominations she still wasn't offered leading lady roles. She had to go to tv(How to Get Away with Murder) in order to get a starring role and of course it took a Black showrunner(Shonda Rimes) to do it.
This book flew by. Viola is an amazing storyteller and I bet she would be just as amazing writing fiction.
I highly recommend Finding Me, even if you don't normally enjoy Hollywood memiors.
Finding Me is a raw and honest memior about growing up in abject poverty with an abusive and alcoholic father. Surviving child sexual abuse/incest and coping with systemic racism to become an Oscar winning actress.
Viola Davis has not had an easy life. Becoming an actress probably saved her life. I mean Viola had to deal with racist bullying from kids at school and when she was in grade school her teacher told her she would never be anything because she's Black. I felt that so intensely because my 3rd grade teacher said that Black people couldn't be doctors or lawyers, so we should focus on trades....this was in the 1990's. These things still happen today as well.
Viola Davis is such a tough woman. She fought through poverty and the racism that Hollywood runs on. I mean even after 2 Oscar nominations she still wasn't offered leading lady roles. She had to go to tv(How to Get Away with Murder) in order to get a starring role and of course it took a Black showrunner(Shonda Rimes) to do it.
This book flew by. Viola is an amazing storyteller and I bet she would be just as amazing writing fiction.
I highly recommend Finding Me, even if you don't normally enjoy Hollywood memiors.
August 21, 2022
Phenomenal memoir. Highly recommend!
Viola Davis lived in abject poverty oftentimes without heat, clean clothing, clean bedding, and food. She was continually harassed and bullied. Throughout her life, she experienced what she calls the one-two punch of colorism and sexism.
Several events early in life helped her dream big. Her sister Dianne, a fourth grade teacher, seeing Cicely Tyson on television, and attending Upward Bound spurred her to dream about who she could become.
Yet the demons of not feeling worthy continued to haunt her until she found love and therapy.
It is an incredible story. While reading this book, I have been listening to Cicely Tyson's memoir, Just As I Am. Viola provides the Foreward and listening to her voice and the impact on Viola at 7 years old when she saw Cicely Tyson on television is a powerful testimonial about role models and the need to ensure diversity in arts, entertainment and all industries.
Highly, highly recommend!
Viola Davis lived in abject poverty oftentimes without heat, clean clothing, clean bedding, and food. She was continually harassed and bullied. Throughout her life, she experienced what she calls the one-two punch of colorism and sexism.
Several events early in life helped her dream big. Her sister Dianne, a fourth grade teacher, seeing Cicely Tyson on television, and attending Upward Bound spurred her to dream about who she could become.
Yet the demons of not feeling worthy continued to haunt her until she found love and therapy.
It is an incredible story. While reading this book, I have been listening to Cicely Tyson's memoir, Just As I Am. Viola provides the Foreward and listening to her voice and the impact on Viola at 7 years old when she saw Cicely Tyson on television is a powerful testimonial about role models and the need to ensure diversity in arts, entertainment and all industries.
Highly, highly recommend!
April 8, 2023
I don’t watch much TV or film so I didn’t know a lot about Viola Davis before reading this memoir, however I still enjoyed Finding Me a lot. I loved Davis’s honesty about her childhood growing up in poverty and in an abusive household. She doesn’t hold back any details and reading about all the rats she lived with and the abuse she witnessed and experienced felt heartbreaking. I enjoyed too her journey of growing up and getting out of that household, to develop into the talented and amazing actress she is today. Throughout the memoir, she recounts specific scenes, conversations, and events so the book felt immersive rather than boring. I liked her realness about so many elements of her life, including the awful colorism she faced as a dark-skinned Black woman, the difficulty of making a living as an actress, and what it felt like for her to witness her abusive father change into a genuinely kind person over time. Also, always appreciate when someone writes about what they learned from therapy.
Toward the end of the book, the intersection of her writing about her career and her writing about the evolution of her family dynamic sometimes merged in a way that didn’t always work for me. However, I imagine it’s hard to put together a memoir where your fans are curious about both of these elements of your life. Overall, recommended to those who are interested in memoirs about difficult families, the lives of those who work in the arts, or Viola Davis fans!
Toward the end of the book, the intersection of her writing about her career and her writing about the evolution of her family dynamic sometimes merged in a way that didn’t always work for me. However, I imagine it’s hard to put together a memoir where your fans are curious about both of these elements of your life. Overall, recommended to those who are interested in memoirs about difficult families, the lives of those who work in the arts, or Viola Davis fans!
September 1, 2022
This is a 2022 Modern Mrs Darcy Summer Reading Guide selection.
An honest, unflinching, and utterly brilliant account of how one of the best actors of our time became who she is today. Davis begins at the beginning: born on a South Carolina plantation (truly), she shortly moved with her mother and alcoholic father to Central Falls, Rhode Island, where she grew up in dire poverty. Her childhood was riddled with trauma: she shares devastating stories of enduring racism, constant hunger, rampant sexual assault by neighborhood men, and constantly reeking because her family couldn’t afford to do laundry. But when she saw Cecily Tyson on TV, she was inspired to take up acting, first succeeding in small sketches at school and later earning a college scholarship. Davis recounts the successes and heartbreaks of her early career in intimate detail, including a life-changing trip to Africa while at Julliard herself and her craft. I was fascinated by her philosophy of creativity, and how she thinks about her field today. A wonder of a memoir, filled with strength, wisdom, grit, and resilience.
An honest, unflinching, and utterly brilliant account of how one of the best actors of our time became who she is today. Davis begins at the beginning: born on a South Carolina plantation (truly), she shortly moved with her mother and alcoholic father to Central Falls, Rhode Island, where she grew up in dire poverty. Her childhood was riddled with trauma: she shares devastating stories of enduring racism, constant hunger, rampant sexual assault by neighborhood men, and constantly reeking because her family couldn’t afford to do laundry. But when she saw Cecily Tyson on TV, she was inspired to take up acting, first succeeding in small sketches at school and later earning a college scholarship. Davis recounts the successes and heartbreaks of her early career in intimate detail, including a life-changing trip to Africa while at Julliard herself and her craft. I was fascinated by her philosophy of creativity, and how she thinks about her field today. A wonder of a memoir, filled with strength, wisdom, grit, and resilience.
September 23, 2022
9/23/22
I had to update the picture from my previous review. This was before I knew about The Woman King. There is no better picture than Viola Davis is WARIORESS MODE!!!
________
Audio - 5+++++ Stars
Her Story - 5++++++ Raw, Honest, Courageous Stars!
I had to update the picture from my previous review. This was before I knew about The Woman King. There is no better picture than Viola Davis is WARIORESS MODE!!!
________
Audio - 5+++++ Stars
Her Story - 5++++++ Raw, Honest, Courageous Stars!
June 9, 2023
Viola Davis’s Finding Me stopped me dead in my tracks. “Who are you”, Will Smith inquires.
Ms. Davis didn’t immediately understand the question. When Mr. Smith explained what he meant she hit a revelation.
Here I stopped the audio. Even though owning the hardback was an absolute. The audio is as well. Hearing Ms. Davis share her truth is as important to me as Ms. Tyson sharing hers the day she died when the audio showed up in my Audible.
Aware of Ms. Davis’s childhood prior to this book see her relationship to those events in a new light. One that split the darkness of mine.
It just so happens while working with a counselor the VA assigned me we came to a point recently. Connecting my military PTSD from where it began during service of the nation to a meaning of unexpected importance.
The moment Ms. Davis shares who she is. I asked myself the same question.
Having a similar backstory in many ways to Ms. Davis feel like we could have grow up best friends.
I was treated very similarly. So much so my parents named my first pet, Ugly.
It wasn’t until I grew up realized their view was their own and not who I am.
The relationship I have to the question, Who am I helped me love Ms. Davis more. Which I didn’t think I could or needed.
Ms. Davis for who she was before fame is the reason I chose her as a hero. I knew this book would be important to me. Though didn’t expect this much.
Before continuing paused to add this to the start of a review.
How does one review a life so heartbreakingly lived so generously.
Thank you Ms. Davis. Being brave and vulnerable is painful for me still. Thank you for leading your story. I know I’m not the only one who is and will be impacted.
Through you through me to others it’s my hope whoever is touched will find Hope. Peace. Joy in the wounds of why they are, too.
I’ll be adding and doing a full review. Couldn’t wait to share because of the size of the vibe and importance to me. Maybe you as well.
Stay tuned … more to come …
(I now realize I forgot to add to the review. Please accept my apology. It’s a fantastic book on audio 😁)
/\ update
Preorder heaven: hardcover, audio, asking the library to order so other people can borrow it, letting ya’ll know on #goodreads I’m excited. Tic tock … April 26th can’t arrive quick enough ❤️
Ms. Davis didn’t immediately understand the question. When Mr. Smith explained what he meant she hit a revelation.
Here I stopped the audio. Even though owning the hardback was an absolute. The audio is as well. Hearing Ms. Davis share her truth is as important to me as Ms. Tyson sharing hers the day she died when the audio showed up in my Audible.
Aware of Ms. Davis’s childhood prior to this book see her relationship to those events in a new light. One that split the darkness of mine.
It just so happens while working with a counselor the VA assigned me we came to a point recently. Connecting my military PTSD from where it began during service of the nation to a meaning of unexpected importance.
The moment Ms. Davis shares who she is. I asked myself the same question.
Having a similar backstory in many ways to Ms. Davis feel like we could have grow up best friends.
I was treated very similarly. So much so my parents named my first pet, Ugly.
It wasn’t until I grew up realized their view was their own and not who I am.
The relationship I have to the question, Who am I helped me love Ms. Davis more. Which I didn’t think I could or needed.
Ms. Davis for who she was before fame is the reason I chose her as a hero. I knew this book would be important to me. Though didn’t expect this much.
Before continuing paused to add this to the start of a review.
How does one review a life so heartbreakingly lived so generously.
Thank you Ms. Davis. Being brave and vulnerable is painful for me still. Thank you for leading your story. I know I’m not the only one who is and will be impacted.
Through you through me to others it’s my hope whoever is touched will find Hope. Peace. Joy in the wounds of why they are, too.
I’ll be adding and doing a full review. Couldn’t wait to share because of the size of the vibe and importance to me. Maybe you as well.
Stay tuned … more to come …
(I now realize I forgot to add to the review. Please accept my apology. It’s a fantastic book on audio 😁)
/\ update
Preorder heaven: hardcover, audio, asking the library to order so other people can borrow it, letting ya’ll know on #goodreads I’m excited. Tic tock … April 26th can’t arrive quick enough ❤️
May 11, 2022
When I heard last year that Viola Davis had a memoir coming out in April, I excitedly added Finding Me to my TBR list and also thought, I actually don't know that much about her but I do know I'm a huge fan — I loved How to Get Away With Murder.
Viola shares her life story, from early childhood in true poverty in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to finding a love of acting and realizing that's what she wanted to do, to pursuing her dream and accepting herself. She is one of six children, grew up in a crowded home where her dad was abusive to her mom, and her and her siblings often went hungry and unclean. My heart broke listening to the stories Viola shared, including befriending kids who she knew would invite her over after school so that she would be fed at their houses. No child should have to think strategically like this in order to eat.
After high school, Viola went to Rhode Island College then on to Juilliard to study acting. She provides the bleak statistics surrounding the film industry and how few actors and actresses are actually able to make it in this space. We all know it's competitive but the information she notes is stark. She starred in roles on Broadway then made an entrance into film and TV. She took most jobs where she could and frequently battled the whitewashing in Hollywood. When Viola did succeed, she sometimes experienced self doubt, with industry standards, in part, to blame.
She also talks about her personal life, sharing health challenges, meeting her husband, and adopting her daughter. Viola is vulnerable and honest and I have a deep appreciation for not just the excellent actress she is, but the person she is — Someone who overcame so much, who will shed labels and be true to herself. The audiobook of Finding Me is narrated by Viola and this is, in unshocking news, the way to go.
Viola shares her life story, from early childhood in true poverty in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to finding a love of acting and realizing that's what she wanted to do, to pursuing her dream and accepting herself. She is one of six children, grew up in a crowded home where her dad was abusive to her mom, and her and her siblings often went hungry and unclean. My heart broke listening to the stories Viola shared, including befriending kids who she knew would invite her over after school so that she would be fed at their houses. No child should have to think strategically like this in order to eat.
After high school, Viola went to Rhode Island College then on to Juilliard to study acting. She provides the bleak statistics surrounding the film industry and how few actors and actresses are actually able to make it in this space. We all know it's competitive but the information she notes is stark. She starred in roles on Broadway then made an entrance into film and TV. She took most jobs where she could and frequently battled the whitewashing in Hollywood. When Viola did succeed, she sometimes experienced self doubt, with industry standards, in part, to blame.
She also talks about her personal life, sharing health challenges, meeting her husband, and adopting her daughter. Viola is vulnerable and honest and I have a deep appreciation for not just the excellent actress she is, but the person she is — Someone who overcame so much, who will shed labels and be true to herself. The audiobook of Finding Me is narrated by Viola and this is, in unshocking news, the way to go.
May 3, 2022
Abandoned this book about half way through ...
I didn't like the format, but I appreciated Viola's narration. This memoir is like a conversation with Viola Davis, it doesn't have any real structure and I didn't feel like I learned anything inspiring. As far as a book for black women? It's not. This is one of those stories to teach white people/people of any other race how hard some black people have had it. I believe her story probably has potential to be great but I personally could not enjoy it in this casual, overly descriptive narrative format.
I didn't like the format, but I appreciated Viola's narration. This memoir is like a conversation with Viola Davis, it doesn't have any real structure and I didn't feel like I learned anything inspiring. As far as a book for black women? It's not. This is one of those stories to teach white people/people of any other race how hard some black people have had it. I believe her story probably has potential to be great but I personally could not enjoy it in this casual, overly descriptive narrative format.
January 14, 2024
I love Viola Davis. I love that she has always stood out as herself. She is unapologetically beautiful from her soul to her skin. She is brave when others would balk. She has bared her heart to the public to be an example and to let others know it is okay to be yourself, even if that is different from whatever B.S. society labels as "normal," "acceptable," or "beautiful." She is well-deserving of all the accolades she has been awarded and many more.
I cried so many times listening to this. I connected to many parts of this book emotionally and mentally. I have tears in my eyes just thinking about how to do this book justice with a mere review.
Viola reading it to me (go with the audio, please, please) was an incredibly personal and intimate feeling. Finding Me is raw and honest, and it feels like you are sitting in a room with Viola, and she is telling you about her life. And my lord, what a life. What a feat to have escaped, let alone found the spotlight. She is not trying to make you feel sorry for her; she is merely baring her soul and allowing you, as the reader, into her introspection of how she became the spectacular woman she is today.
Feeling like I was in the room listening to her story made me want to reach out and hug her and let her know that she is worthy and how her light shines through in the world. I just wanted her to know that she is loved, and I wanted to hug her family.
I started from a poverty stance, but I was blessed in mine due to the help of many others and the family that helped save us. As an adult, when the economy crashed, I was at the mercy of my family, especially my grandmother; things could have been a lot worse without her. There was abuse on a much lesser scale, but it helped me find a clue of relatability and to feel for a small percentage of the terrors she experienced.
Nothing I experienced can even glimpse a moment in the Davis family life of poverty so extreme that it is almost unfathomable, of abuse, fear, guilt, and things I can't even put words to. To have gotten away in any semblance of life and still be so strong, put so much of herself into others, and be so caring and kind. I can't do this justice. You have to hear it in Viola's words.
Can we all exude a bit more kindness and compassion and freaking assistance when someone is struggling? NO ONE can see the unimaginable battles each individual is facing in life.
I hope to hug you one day, Viola. It feels weirdly essential to me to do this. I'm a hugger.
5+ stars. The writing was extremely well done, and the flow was impeccable.
I cried so many times listening to this. I connected to many parts of this book emotionally and mentally. I have tears in my eyes just thinking about how to do this book justice with a mere review.
Viola reading it to me (go with the audio, please, please) was an incredibly personal and intimate feeling. Finding Me is raw and honest, and it feels like you are sitting in a room with Viola, and she is telling you about her life. And my lord, what a life. What a feat to have escaped, let alone found the spotlight. She is not trying to make you feel sorry for her; she is merely baring her soul and allowing you, as the reader, into her introspection of how she became the spectacular woman she is today.
Feeling like I was in the room listening to her story made me want to reach out and hug her and let her know that she is worthy and how her light shines through in the world. I just wanted her to know that she is loved, and I wanted to hug her family.
I started from a poverty stance, but I was blessed in mine due to the help of many others and the family that helped save us. As an adult, when the economy crashed, I was at the mercy of my family, especially my grandmother; things could have been a lot worse without her. There was abuse on a much lesser scale, but it helped me find a clue of relatability and to feel for a small percentage of the terrors she experienced.
Nothing I experienced can even glimpse a moment in the Davis family life of poverty so extreme that it is almost unfathomable, of abuse, fear, guilt, and things I can't even put words to. To have gotten away in any semblance of life and still be so strong, put so much of herself into others, and be so caring and kind. I can't do this justice. You have to hear it in Viola's words.
Can we all exude a bit more kindness and compassion and freaking assistance when someone is struggling? NO ONE can see the unimaginable battles each individual is facing in life.
I hope to hug you one day, Viola. It feels weirdly essential to me to do this. I'm a hugger.
5+ stars. The writing was extremely well done, and the flow was impeccable.
June 22, 2022
This is one of my most anticipated reads, ever, because I’m such a big fan of Viola Davis, and it quickly became one of my favorite memoirs, ever.
Viola is so incredibly raw and honest when sharing stories from her childhood, her journey into being an actress, and the lessons she learned along the way as a daughter, wife, mother, and artist. She highlights the brutal racism she had to deal with as a child, the abuse she faced from family members, what it was like to grow up in poverty, and her deep desire to make something more out of her life.
Full of wisdom, love, and light, listening to Viola narrate her story elevates the experience of this book because she so expertly packs so much emotion into each sentence that was spoken.
I’m honored to learn more about one of my heroes and am utterly in awe of her journey that was gorgeously written, honest, and unforgettable.
Viola is so incredibly raw and honest when sharing stories from her childhood, her journey into being an actress, and the lessons she learned along the way as a daughter, wife, mother, and artist. She highlights the brutal racism she had to deal with as a child, the abuse she faced from family members, what it was like to grow up in poverty, and her deep desire to make something more out of her life.
Full of wisdom, love, and light, listening to Viola narrate her story elevates the experience of this book because she so expertly packs so much emotion into each sentence that was spoken.
I’m honored to learn more about one of my heroes and am utterly in awe of her journey that was gorgeously written, honest, and unforgettable.
February 4, 2023
There are some stories that move you. This was one of them. A true account from a great actress about navigating a life that has been challenging. But there was also love there, and Davis used that love to get to propel her forward. I felt hopeful for all of us. We can also accomplish great things by hard work and following our dreams. A cliché, but they are sometimes true.
June 29, 2022
Really great memoir about Viola Davis’ journey from a child growing up in poverty to becoming an award winning actress. She is so honest and open about her journey that it was moving to read. She is funny and fierce and someone I like more now than before only knowing her as an actress. The writing was amazing and the story compelling. I think it’s always nice to see who public figures or stars are behind the image we create and this glimpse behind the image did not disappoint.
July 27, 2023
Viola Davis, an American actress and producer, is one of the few performers who have won an Emmy, a Grammy, an Oscar, and a Tony (EGOT). Davis's memoir 'Finding Me' illustrates that the hard-won accolades resulted from determination, hard work, talent, luck, and encouragement from the occasional mentor.
Viola Davis
Viola was born in South Carolina, the fifth of six children belonging to Dan and Mae Alice Davis. When Viola was very small, the Davis's and their three youngest children moved to Central Falls, Rhode Island, where Dan Davis worked as a horse groomer at racetracks. The older children were raised by their grandparents until Mae Alice could no longer stand to hear stories of them being beaten in school, and sent for them to come to Rhode Island.
Young Viola Davis
Most of the people in Central Falls were white, and Viola was the butt of vicious racist slurs since she was a child. When Viola told her Mama the boys in her third grade class chased her every day, calling her black, ugly, n****r, her Mama told her, "Vahla, don' you run from those bastards anymore....They mess with you, you jug [stab] 'em.....Don't come back here crying 'bout those boys or I'll wop yo' ass." Mae Alice Davis was a woman with six kids, who didn't have time to go to school every day to fight her children's battles.
Viola Davis with her mother Mae Alice Davis
Viola Davis with her father Dan Davis
Viola's home life was difficult as well. Dan Davis was a raging alcoholic who brutally beat his wife and had open affairs. The Davis family also lived in grinding poverty: they often went hungry; didn't have coins for the laundromat; lacked heat and telephone service; and had rats all over the apartment.
Viola writes, "At night, we sisters would huddle on a top bunk for warmth, horrified at the sounds of rodents eating pigeons on the roof, eating our toys, squealing. We would wrap bedsheets around our necks to protect ourselves from bites. Going to the bathroom at night in the midst of this was not an option....So, we just peed [the bed]." Viola admits she was a bet-wetter until she was fourteen. Thus the Davis children reeked of urine, to the point where Viola's teacher whispered in her ear one day, "You need to tell your mother to get some soap and wash you! The odor is horrible!"
On top of all that, Viola and her sisters were often the victims of sexual abuse. Viola recalls, "Sexual abuse back in the day didn't have a name. The abusers were called "dirty old men"...and [abuse] was shrouded in silence. What made us sitting ducks was our lack of supervision and lack of knowledge." The abuse ranged from random old men on the street trying to get a kiss, to men at birthday parties playing catch the girl, to older neighborhood boys who 'babysat', to Viola's brother - whose sexual curiosity crossed the line to penetration of two of his sisters.
In spite of all this, Viola was a good student. She recalls, "School was our salvation. We coped by excelling academically." Viola could have done well in many areas, but the acting bug bit her when she saw Cicely Tyson in 'The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman." Viola writes, "I wanted to be a great actor like Miss Tyson....Then Ron Stetson, a young actor and coach, came into my life when I was fourteen." Stetson was Viola's acting coach in the federally funded Upward Bound program. Ron taught his students to act and gave them a safe space to share their feelings. Viola notes, "The emotional release acting allowed gave me great joy."
Then, shortly before Viola graduated high school, she was selected to go to Miami, Florida for the 'Arts Recognition and Talent Search' competition. There Viola was named a 'Promising Young Artist' which eventually led to a scholarship to Rhode Island College.
Teenage Viola Davis
Viola Davis (far right) with her siblings
College started badly for Viola, who felt she could not permit herself to study acting. Viola feared an entertainment career would not help her support herself, and she didn't want to live in poverty like her parents. Thus Viola took English classes and fell into a deep depression. In sophomore year, Viola found her courage, decided to be a theater major and was on her way career-wise. Nevertheless, college was a challenge in other ways.
At Rhode Island College, there was a food program during the week, but not during the weekends. So, to eat regularly, Viola had a lot of jobs during school. These included working as an RA and counselor in the summer Preparatory Enrollment Program; working in the college library; working the Rhode Island College front desk; working at a drug store in Central Falls; and more. Viola writes, "Working hard is great when it's motivated by passion and love and enthusiasm. But working hard when it's motivated by deprivation is not pleasant."
Additionally, Rhode Island College was less than one percent 'other' when Viola attended, other being Hispanic, Asian, Black, and Middle Eastern. The rest were white, and many students were blatantly racist.
Nevertheless, Viola persevered and graduated after five years, part of it spent in the theater program at the California Polytechnic University in Pomona, on a student exchange plan. For a year after graduating from Rhode Island College, Viola participated in various theater programs and did miscellaneous odd jobs to support herself. At the time, Viola wanted to grow up. She writes, "I never had sex, never had a boyfriend, never lived on my own. I never traveled overseas..... I wanted to experience life. I wanted my life to be as expansive as I felt my mind was, my imagination was."
Following her gap year, during which Viola became a "professional actress", she went on to Juilliard School in New York City. She also entered into relationships with the wrong men - self-centered men who didn't treat her well.
Viola Davis
Juilliard was grueling, both academically and psychologically, in part because it was geared to white actors. To counterbalance, Viola spent one summer in Africa with dance choreographer Chuck Davis, studying the Wolof Jola, Mandinka, and SouSou tribes. The trip galvanized Viola. She notes, "There was no mistaking the transformation that was happening. Suddenly the anxiety that always existed in the pit of my gut went away completely."
Viola graduated from Juilliard, and....nothing happened. She writes, "I was a poor kid and now I was a poor adult. I had a hot-shot agent and....I would audition, get a callback, and then someone else would get it....I was too young, too old, too dark, not sexy." Moreover, Viola had to confront the one-two punch of colorism and sexism. Though Black rom-coms were happening, none of the 'cute Black girl' characters looked like her.
Though Viola may have faced more obstacles than some other actors, she admits her struggles were universal. She says, "Here's the truth....Our profession at any given time has a 95 percent unemployment rate. Only 1 percent of actors make $50,000 a year or more and only 0.04 percent of actors are famous." To be a big success, an actor has to be extremely talented and extraordinarily lucky.
Viola Davis in 'Fences' on Broadway
To work in her field, Viola took jobs that were given to her, mostly in the theater. Viola felt the need to support herself AND help her family. She writes, "I have gotten more calls than I can remember to pay gas bills, grocery bills....I didn't know how to say no to requests for food, money, payment for utilities." Viola writes a good bit about her family and their ongoing struggles, which she did her best to mitigate. When Viola's father was 70, he got pancreatic cancer, wasted away, and died. Viola writes, "We were his dream; his children and grandchildren....we were the baton they were passing as they were sinking into the quicksand of racism, poverty, Jim Crow, segregation, injustice, family trauma, and dysfunction." Privation affected Viola's health as well, and some time later she had fibroid surgery and a hysterectomy.
Career-wise, after Viola got a role in the 1998 HBO movie 'The Pentagon Wars', there was a domino effect, and more television work came along. Still, many roles eluded Viola because, in her words, she wasn't "pretty enough."
Viola Davis in 'The Pentagon Wars'
Viola prayed to meet a good man, and finally, on the set of 'City of Angels', she met Julius Tennon, whom she later married. Viola recalls, "As soon as he came into my life, my life got better because I created a family with him, with someone who loved me....I was no longer solely defined by the family that raised me and my childhood memories."
Viola Davis with Julius Tennon
Viola Davis, Julius Tennon, and their daughter Genesis
In 2001 Viola won a Tony Award for King Hedley II, and then the 2008 movie 'Doubt' marked her transition from stage actor to film/Hollywood actor. Viola writes a good deal about her subsequent successes and accolades, which include an Oscar for 'Fences' in 2016 and many other honors and awards.
Viola Davis accepting the Tony Award for King Hedley II
Viola Davis in the film version of 'Fences'
Viola Davis with her Oscar for Fences
Viola Davis in 'Doubt'
Viola Davis in 'The Help'
At the age of forty-seven Viola got one of her best known roles, playing Annalise Keating in the television series 'How to Get Away With Murder.' Annalise was described as a sexual, smart, vulnerable, possibly sociopathic, highly astute, criminal defense attorney. Viola writes, "The eight-year-old girl who had never been told 'You're worthy; you're beautiful' suddenly found herself as a leading lady, and a mouthpiece of all the women who looked like her."
Viola Davis as Annalise Keating in 'How to Get Away With Murder'
As a powerful symbol for Black women, Viola writes, "We are complicated. We are feminine. We are sexual. We are beautiful. We're pretty. There are people out there who desire us. We are deserving." Viola's life and career proves her point.
In addition to being a story about Viola's personal journey, this memoir can serve as a primer for aspiring actors, because it provides information about what to expect and how to maneuver in show business.
Viola is very honest about her life and career, and her numerous anecdotes include stories that are scary; shocking; embarrassing; humorous; sad; happy; romantic; joyful; and more.
This is a well-crafted, important story, highly recommended.
You can follow my reviews at https://reviewsbybarbsaffer.blogspot.com
June 30, 2023
I’ve always admired Viola Davis as an actress.
I mean, look at her! She’s formidable, passionate and can do any acting role that’s given to her. She’s a f’ing badass.
After listening to Finding Me, I also love her as a person. I’m also a survivor of a terrible childhood.
This memoir really resonated with me and I was on the edge of my seat while listening to her life story and truth she found after finding her way out of the darkness.
I did the audiobook and Viola does an amazing job narrating this.
She goes into her life as a young girl and the demons she had to face while living in poverty, abuse and racism. She also goes into how she became an actress and all of the hurdles she had to face as a dark skinned, black woman that’s not considered either beautiful, petite or fragile.
Well Viola, you are beautiful to me and I love you even more after listening to Finding Me.
If you love memoirs and want to know more about Viola Davis, do not sleep on this one!
It's one of the best memoirs that I've heard in the last few years.
I mean, look at her! She’s formidable, passionate and can do any acting role that’s given to her. She’s a f’ing badass.
After listening to Finding Me, I also love her as a person. I’m also a survivor of a terrible childhood.
This memoir really resonated with me and I was on the edge of my seat while listening to her life story and truth she found after finding her way out of the darkness.
I did the audiobook and Viola does an amazing job narrating this.
She goes into her life as a young girl and the demons she had to face while living in poverty, abuse and racism. She also goes into how she became an actress and all of the hurdles she had to face as a dark skinned, black woman that’s not considered either beautiful, petite or fragile.
Well Viola, you are beautiful to me and I love you even more after listening to Finding Me.
If you love memoirs and want to know more about Viola Davis, do not sleep on this one!
It's one of the best memoirs that I've heard in the last few years.
May 5, 2022
BAY-BEEEHHH.
STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND RUN, RUUUNNN TO THE BOOKSTORE AND BUY THIS BOOK, YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED!!! ITS A TOPS!!! 💚💚💚
The way in which I can relate to this memoir is astounding… I had no clue that I shared so many things with Miss. Vee!
I love the relationship she shares with her mom… imma go ahead and call my mother a great love of mine because SHE JUST IS!!! 💚💚💚 thank you for helping me see this Vee.
She and her sisters simply gave me life! As a girlie with only brothers, I quite enjoy seeing, hearing and knowing women with sisters because that dynamic to me is soooo precious. I’d be a dangerous woman had I had a couple of sisters lol! Shout out to y’all for sticking together cause honey me and my brothers are TIGHT LIKE GLUE!
I also love her story about her hubby, chiiiiiiile— AINT NOTHING LIKE A SOUTHERN MAN… I too, tend to lean towards them as well because they simply understand so much! This is not a diss to any other men in the world, cause #IYKYK 😘 and there it is.
Lastly, what a journey. WHAT A FREAKIN JOURNEY! I SAW Vee when she played in Antwone Fisher. She captivated me in such a small amount of time on screen!!! I now need to go back and watch “Doubt,” & “City of Angels.” Of course I loved her in “The Help” as well as “How to Get Away With Murder.” Hell! She had me ready to go and grab a JD!!!
I can say so much about how our life events sorta overlap but this is her story so I will leave it there. Never once did I think that she was unpretty or undesirable… but what I will say ISSSS that NO ONE ON THIS PLANET SLINGS SNOT LIKE LADY VIOLA DAVISSSSSS!!! Just prepare to cry when she cries, smile when she smiles, level up when she’s on the screen bossing it up and such and such & this and that 😂.
I AM THEEEE memoir girl. Vee, what a beautiful story, I’m now headed to Malik’s Books for the hardcopy cause my shelf NEEDS this beautiful book!!!
WOW. 💚✨💚✨💚✨
STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND RUN, RUUUNNN TO THE BOOKSTORE AND BUY THIS BOOK, YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED!!! ITS A TOPS!!! 💚💚💚
The way in which I can relate to this memoir is astounding… I had no clue that I shared so many things with Miss. Vee!
I love the relationship she shares with her mom… imma go ahead and call my mother a great love of mine because SHE JUST IS!!! 💚💚💚 thank you for helping me see this Vee.
She and her sisters simply gave me life! As a girlie with only brothers, I quite enjoy seeing, hearing and knowing women with sisters because that dynamic to me is soooo precious. I’d be a dangerous woman had I had a couple of sisters lol! Shout out to y’all for sticking together cause honey me and my brothers are TIGHT LIKE GLUE!
I also love her story about her hubby, chiiiiiiile— AINT NOTHING LIKE A SOUTHERN MAN… I too, tend to lean towards them as well because they simply understand so much! This is not a diss to any other men in the world, cause #IYKYK 😘 and there it is.
Lastly, what a journey. WHAT A FREAKIN JOURNEY! I SAW Vee when she played in Antwone Fisher. She captivated me in such a small amount of time on screen!!! I now need to go back and watch “Doubt,” & “City of Angels.” Of course I loved her in “The Help” as well as “How to Get Away With Murder.” Hell! She had me ready to go and grab a JD!!!
I can say so much about how our life events sorta overlap but this is her story so I will leave it there. Never once did I think that she was unpretty or undesirable… but what I will say ISSSS that NO ONE ON THIS PLANET SLINGS SNOT LIKE LADY VIOLA DAVISSSSSS!!! Just prepare to cry when she cries, smile when she smiles, level up when she’s on the screen bossing it up and such and such & this and that 😂.
I AM THEEEE memoir girl. Vee, what a beautiful story, I’m now headed to Malik’s Books for the hardcopy cause my shelf NEEDS this beautiful book!!!
WOW. 💚✨💚✨💚✨
June 5, 2022
such a devastating memoir, but also so incredibly beautiful and hopeful at the same time. i am (even more so now) in awe of viola davis’ strength, resilience, talent, determination, and candour. this was also my first audiobook, and i couldn’t have picked a better one to start with because viola’s performance was truly incredible.
December 8, 2022
Truly enjoyed listening to the audiobook, it pulled me out of my audiobook slump! It’s indeed a powerful memoir about accepting and acknowledging one true-self. Davis also doesn’t shy away from sharing her ugly childhood details. I’m so glad she became the woman that she is today!
January 19, 2023
You have heard her name and seen her face: Viola Davis. In this riveting autobiography, we get to know Viola as she finds her truth, revisits childhood memories, and reflects on what made her the woman (and EGOT winner) she is today. The book is absolutely exceptional, Davis finds ways to make you cry and shows her readers the work and effort she has put into her success. Viola Davis is very open with her mental health journey and the therapy she has worked through to deal with past traumas. This autobiography is admirable and is a must-read. TW: this book does discuss childhood traumas and deeper issues. Please do research before reading this book to see if it is suitable for you. -Alyssa C.
Find a copy at Scottsdale Public Library
Find a copy at Scottsdale Public Library
March 5, 2023
View this review on my booksta!!
The quote above is a holistic emblem of the entire memoir. Viola is as unwavering with the recollection of her own pain and trauma as she is wholehearted with the reminiscence of her hope and healing. She narrates her truth as it is, without pomp or embellishment, in all its bare-faced and naked glory. Raw and poignant, Finding Me jars you from the very first chapter and demands your undivided attention as its writer, narrator, and muse beckons you to shadow her footsteps in her trek to triumph.
And what an arduous and bumpy trek it was. I have so so much respect for this woman. Viola doesn’t attempt to soften the blow or make-palatable the details of her impoverished childhood, the abuse she had suffered as a black woman, the hardships she had to endure as an aspiring and then even as a blossoming actor. This is not a memoir that traces a celebrity’s humble beginnings to their eventual success; this is a memoir of healing, of finally making peace with oneself.
It’s also a love letter to her craft; a marveling at the power of art to transform both its object and creator, yes, but also a reflection on its nature and facets — how did it look like liberated from the constraints of eurocentrism? How is acting a feat of creation and not of mimicry?
Most importantly, this memoir is a battlecry. A fervent rejection of the one-dimensional portraits Hollywood paints of black people and their experiences. American society and the entertainment industry remain so fundamentally flawed, that Viola, with all the awareness of being one, continues to be an exemption to the long-established rules and customs which continue to impede black women from social mobility. Our latest EGOT legend douses us all with the ice cold truth: her innate talent and sheer grit got her to the threshold but it was a healthy dose of luck that nudged doors open; luck that served as the unreliable substitute to the universal key that is whiteness.
To wrap this up, a 4.75 as I do have some very slight technical gripes with the writing - some overused words and turns of phrases. But they're silly little personal peeves that are inconsequential in the long run. An easy and solid round up to 5.
“Taking off the wig in How to Get Away With Murder was my duty to honor black women by not showing any image that is palatable to the oppressor, to people who have tarnished, punished the image of black womanhood for so long.”
The quote above is a holistic emblem of the entire memoir. Viola is as unwavering with the recollection of her own pain and trauma as she is wholehearted with the reminiscence of her hope and healing. She narrates her truth as it is, without pomp or embellishment, in all its bare-faced and naked glory. Raw and poignant, Finding Me jars you from the very first chapter and demands your undivided attention as its writer, narrator, and muse beckons you to shadow her footsteps in her trek to triumph.
And what an arduous and bumpy trek it was. I have so so much respect for this woman. Viola doesn’t attempt to soften the blow or make-palatable the details of her impoverished childhood, the abuse she had suffered as a black woman, the hardships she had to endure as an aspiring and then even as a blossoming actor. This is not a memoir that traces a celebrity’s humble beginnings to their eventual success; this is a memoir of healing, of finally making peace with oneself.
“It was a radical acceptance of my existence without apology and without ownership.”
“Success pales in comparison to healing.”
It’s also a love letter to her craft; a marveling at the power of art to transform both its object and creator, yes, but also a reflection on its nature and facets — how did it look like liberated from the constraints of eurocentrism? How is acting a feat of creation and not of mimicry?
“I was always on the outside of Juilliard because I wasn’t on the inside of me. I was fighting an ideology about what an actor was, and it was all born in the depth of white superiority.”
“An actor’s work is to be an observer of life. My job is not to study other actors, because that is not studying life. As much as I can, I study people. If you’re my audience, it’s not my job to give you a fantasy. It is my job to give you yourself.”
Most importantly, this memoir is a battlecry. A fervent rejection of the one-dimensional portraits Hollywood paints of black people and their experiences. American society and the entertainment industry remain so fundamentally flawed, that Viola, with all the awareness of being one, continues to be an exemption to the long-established rules and customs which continue to impede black women from social mobility. Our latest EGOT legend douses us all with the ice cold truth: her innate talent and sheer grit got her to the threshold but it was a healthy dose of luck that nudged doors open; luck that served as the unreliable substitute to the universal key that is whiteness.
“Luck is an elusive monster who chooses when to come out of its cave to strike and who will be its recipient. It’s a business of deprivation.”
“There was a lack of intentional investment in us little Black girls… There was an expectation of perfectionism without the knowledge of emotional well-being… How do I get to the mountain-top without legs?... no one is equipping you with tools to do ‘better', to ‘make a life’.”
To wrap this up, a 4.75 as I do have some very slight technical gripes with the writing - some overused words and turns of phrases. But they're silly little personal peeves that are inconsequential in the long run. An easy and solid round up to 5.
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