Reality is individual. We all have different tools with which to perceive it.
The Aussies have done it again! Aussie author Nansi Kunze has created a tReality is individual. We all have different tools with which to perceive it.
The Aussies have done it again! Aussie author Nansi Kunze has created a thrilling virtual world within one thriller of a book.
I don't know what it is about virtual reality that gets my motor running. The world of gaming calls to me like a bird feeder calls to a squirrel. Then it spins me round and round until I'm too dizzy to walk straight and all I can think about is how long until I can hop back on.
You've heard of the Holodeck, right? If not, do yourself a favor and go watch some Star Trek: The Next Generation. It also has a nice piece of android named Data. Rawr.
The key technology featured in this book is basically the predecessor to something like The Holodeck or The Matrix. The tech is also close to what could potentially be achieved in our lifetimes, making it all the more intriguing.
The Rundown
Dangerously Placed centers around a young girl named Alex, who is beginning her work experience at a company called Simulcorp. But this isn't your everyday paper pushing office. It's all virtual. Using something called a Virk suit in a specially designed Virk Room, people from all over the world can sign in and meet up in a virtual work environment.
Things are going well until... dun, dun, dun... someone gets murdered. Of course, in true young adult style, our main character tasks herself with discovering the identity of the killer. It's an especially important task, considering she is one the main suspects.
The World-building and Pacing
When I first started, it reminded me of a cartoonish cross between Nancy Drew and The Matrix. I don't know why, but I imagined this book in CGI. It would make an amazing Pixar film, but it would, of course, need a much cheesier name. Something like... The Virkuals!
I give this an A++ for concept and I am a concept kind of girl. In fact, if the book has a stellar premise involving speculative fiction, I am usually a pretty happy campy-camper. Of course characterization is important as well, and I quite enjoyed the characters in Dangerously Placed, in spite of their Disney Channel Original tendencies (which the cheeseball monster inside of me happens to love). Though the science may not have been perfect, it was the most believable young adult sci-fi I have read in quite some time.
It was fast and thrilling with a hint of scandal. It had about as many twists as an episode of Lost... but without the side-character eating smoke monster. There may or may not be a dragon, though!
The evolution of the romantic storyline was unforeseen and unexpected, as well as very, very welcome. You aren't bombarded with instalove right from the beginning, which is a rare find in the current YA market. The relationship developed sincerely and unfolded realistically, or as realistically as possible considering the preposterous situation these teens find themselves in.
The Verdict
I'm giving this one high marks for keeping me thoroughly involved and addicted throughout. It reads a bit younger than I typically gravitate toward, although I think this could open it up to a wider audience. It was entertaining none the less.
Nansi is a fresh science fiction voice in the world of YA. I will definitely be on the lookout for more titles from her! She also agreed to do a guest post for STRANGEMORE....more
Hah. More like Wangst of the Wicked! I kid, I kid.
I made a comment about the first book being Buffy Season One: Disney Channel Version. Well, the seq Hah. More like Wangst of the Wicked! I kid, I kid.
I made a comment about the first book being Buffy Season One: Disney Channel Version. Well, the sequel jumped straight into Buffy Season Six territory. It's dark, sexy, and witty. Much more so than the first.
Admittedly, I wasn't too impressed with Angelfire, the first book in this series, but Wings of the Wicked is abundantly more fun than it's predecessor.
The characters are starting to get into a comfort zone with each other and the chemistry between them is coming alive. The straight forward no-frills prose carries you right into the action and drama.
The Rundown
With the help of her guardian Will, Ellie battles the forces of darkness. She is the Preliator, the only one in the world who wields awesome reaper-slaying, sickle-shaped swords that are infused with the heavenly flame of Angelfire, and she's getting even better in battle. Things have gotten complicated with angelic Will, and he and Ellie fight the feelings they have for each other. A demonic reaper named Cadan begins to make advances toward Ellie, but can she trust him? Now a strong force of darkness is rising up and it will take everything the Preliator and her friends have got to face this new evil.
Characterization and Romance
In the first book, even though it's written in first person, I never felt like I was getting to know Ellie because of her Mary Sue tendencies. Yet somehow, I've really grown to care about her in the sequel, as have many of the other characters. There is Love Triangle. I know what you're thinking: Noooooooooooooooo! Or maybe: Yes, yes, YES! But I actually really liked both of the boys.
First, there's Will. (Why does every book have a Will these days?) His mouth says, "I love you but I can't be with you." But his eyes say, "I can't stay away."
Then there's Cadan. His mouth says, "I love you whether or not want to be with me." But his eyes say, "I'm gonna lock you in my basement."
Guess which one she goes for? NOT the creepy stalker guy. Oh wait, they're both kind of stalkers. Well, they call themselves "guardians" or "protectors" but we all know what that means. (view spoiler)[PEDOSUPERNATURALS! (view spoiler)[Kidding .(view spoiler)[It's not at all weird that they are a thousand and she is seventeen. (hide spoiler)](hide spoiler)](hide spoiler)]
One thing I appreciated: Ellie considers having sex before marriage. Gasp!! Blasphemy! As long as no one puts a fanged supernatural baby in her, I'm fine with it. And PHEW! There were some hot scenes. Ellie was much less chaste and she liked it!
Shockingly, this book took a turn for dark. Several important characters are lost. And man... The characters in this book truly know how to grieve. It's not at all like other similar YA books where close friends or family members die and no one seems to care. So many intense moments of pain and rage fill these pages. They scream, they cry, they bawl their eyes out. Their agony is so believable in those moments.
The characterization is infinitely better in this book. I looked forward to the exchanges between Ellie and almost everyone this time around. Whereas the first book was mainly Ellie being confused and asking questions and being all "Woe is me," our heroine really came into her own in Wings of the Wicked.
The World-Building
This book threw in even more aspects of Buffydom, namely patrolling, which was not an aspect of the first book due to the whole "getting to know you" phase that Ellie was going through with Will and the new world unfolding around her. Patrols were always a important part of the storylines in Buffy, but I had mixed feelings about them being brought into the Angelfire series. Don't the two share quite a bit of similarities as it is? It makes me wonder what's next: turning Ellie's bestie, Kate, into an evil black-eyed witch lesbian?
Still - I have to admit that I ended up enjoying seeing the patrols included. It brought a sense of familiarity to it, complemented by the fact that the characters began to vibe with each other so well in battle.
Despite the obvious similarities to other series, the world was intense and more evolved this time around. They delve a bit deeper into Ellie's past and the specifics around it, but still left a lot to be learned in the upcoming books.
The Verdict
The plotline revolves strongly around action and romance and seems to be setting up for tons of love triangle tension in the next book, which I am greatly looking forward to. Though the writing is "filled to the brim" with cliche, it didn't matter. I found myself reading compulsively with a stupid grin on my face the whole time.
If you're a fan of angel mythology and looking for that next thing, this series just might be it! If you read the first book and are unsure about continuing, let me assure you that I greatly enjoyed it and did not regret it for one second.
As much as I liked this one, I still can't give it five stars, mainly because of an excess of cheesy lines and cliche. However, I enjoyed this one exponentially more than the first book. In fact, I wouldn't have believed how much better it is if I hadn't read it with my own two eyes.
Much less Seventh Heaven (When I see their happy faces smiling back at me-eeee. Yep, now it's going to be stuck in your head. Bwuahahahaha!) and much more Buffy and Supernatural. Really. It was like watching some sort of bizarre crossover spin-off of the two shows and I LOVED it. ...more
* One of them is a mini Sydney-Bristow-in-training, whose family has been falsely accuAlso posted on STRANGEMORE.COM.
Who is in the Heist Society?
* One of them is a mini Sydney-Bristow-in-training, whose family has been falsely accused, and she's armed with a big attitude and huge problems.
* Then there is the handsome and debonair millionaire thief who compares dancing to navigating through a laser grid.
* There is also the beauty who is literally electrifying in high heels and a skirt. At least, when she gets too close to priceless works of art.
* Two of them are the ones who've been blacklisted for stealing from a nun. Because whoever you are, that's just wrong.
* Another is a pickpocket and a newbie, with a British accent and mysterious eyes.
These are the people who make jokes about the time so-and-so ransomed The Queen's prized pooch. They are the teeny-bopper versions of Ocean's Eleven, but with less crew members and an even bigger job.
They are also the ones who take on the biggest heist job in the world. Their story isn't heart-wrenching or gut-churning, but it's fast, fun, and full of intrigue.
I feel like I should tell you more, but the first rule of Heist Society is that you don't... Well, if you don't already know, then I probably shouldn't tell you. ...more
James Patterson is now using the word "imprint" now. God help us all.
Well, considering the imprinting in thAlso posted on STRANGEMORE.COM.
Oh schnikes.
James Patterson is now using the word "imprint" now. God help us all.
Well, considering the imprinting in this book is from one teenager to another and that they are actually BIRD mutants (the term imprint originated from the act of a baby bird bonding with it's mother), it isn't quite as icky as a wolf imprinting on and falling in instatruelove with a newborn baby. Because we all know that bestiality combined with pedophilia is totally romantic, right? But still, Patterson. WTF?
Other than the obvious blatant attempt to appeal to the Twilight generation with the onset of a love triangle between a blond Adonis-type mutant and the rugged dark-haired broody mutant, I had a lot of fun reading this book and the series in general.
I probably should be ashamed to say that I read the Maximum Ride series, but who am I kidding? I have no shame. It's a guilty pleasure. I started reading them before I matured literaturicly, and no, I'm not sure that I'm proving my point by using a made up word like literaturicly but "So what? Who cares?" *multiple exaggerated shoulder shrugs*
The Rundown
For you sci-fi gurus, you may notice similarities with James Cameron's masterpiece television series Dark Angel[image], which if you haven't watched... what the hell is wrong with you? Let me break it down: Jessica Alba, as a mutant, kicking ass while wearing leather - Do you need more convincing than that? REALLY?!
Some facts about the Maximum Ride series by James Patterson:
* Girl named Max, short for Maximum. * She kicks ass and doesn't stop to take names. * She is a mutant with special abilities because of her recombinant DNA. * She has a "flock" of other friends with special abilities. * Her love interest is part of her group but it seems they are destined to NOT be together. * Her main job is saving the world, but she mostly ends up just doing a few odd jobs here and there.
While this may not be Dawson's Creek with mutant teens who have a ridiculously large vocabulary, it IS a lot like Dark Angel, complete with angst, wangst, and a love triangle but specifically with recombinant DNA bird kids! WOOOOOO!
These books are by no means "brain food." In fact, most would consider them juvenile, which is one thing I love about them. They don't use complex or lyrical language. They can be melodramatic at times, but mostly they are just unadulterated fun, not to mention entirely addictive.
The Tone and Pacing
The Maximum Ride books usually fly at a breakneck speed and don't often slow down. The flock is always on the move, always performing ridiculous feats of awesomeness, and always making stupid jokes. Regardless of the camp in these books, they have a lot of heart also, as well as great messages for younger teens or pre-teens.
"There's nothing more dangerous than someone trying to act for the greater good."
Which is so true in lots of ways. Many horrific things have been done in the name of the greater good. Hitler thought the Holocaust would create a superior master race. Religious extremist think that ridding the world of all religious opposition is for the greater good. People who think they have the best intentions can often be the most ruthless.
Apart from messages about saving the world and being the best version of yourself, there are also not-so-complex undertones about doing what's right and taking care of the planet. It did get a little preachy for my taste in one or two of the books, but overall, the series is still worthwhile and hella fun to read. And there is only ONE more after this book. *cries like a little baby, like a little baby in it's crib*
The Verdict
I'm so ridiculously attached to these books and these characters that I just can't give this one any less than 4 stars.
There are not very many articulate reviews of these books (I mean one review actually calls a main character "butt poop") and unfortunately the books themselves are not highly intelligent. There aren't really any prerequisites here. No thinking required.
The Scarecrow could read these books. *sings* "If I only had intelligent conversational techniques."
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These books are FUN, FUN, FUN! And mainly just that, which is exactly what I needed. ...more
Her name is Lo-la. She's a steal-the-show girl. With purple stripeys in her hair, wearing leggings worthy of Cher.Set to "Copacabana" by Barry Manilow.
Her name is Lo-la. She's a steal-the-show girl. With purple stripeys in her hair, wearing leggings worthy of Cher. She's friends with Etienne, and of course, with An-na. The boy next door draws on his hand, and Lola yearns to understand. Across their midnight lawn, they talked from dusk til dawn. They were young and needed each other. But did the boy next door want more?
At Lola's, Lola Nolan's Casa. The hottest thing since Etienne and Anna! At Lola's, Lola Nolan's Casa. Music, and passion, and geek hipster fashion. At Lola's... They fell in love.
His name is Cricket. He's an inventor. He hangs out his window, and keeps his voice real low. And when she's within ear, he beckons her near. But Cricket wouldn't go too far. Because Lola had some scars. And then the tension grew, and hearts were ripped in two. There was love and some rough nights. But just who caused the fight?
At Lola's, Lola Nolan's Casa. The most angst since Etienne and Anna! At Lola's, Lola Nolan's Casa. Sequins and tassels and two gay dad rascals! At Lola's... She lost her love.
Her name is Lo-la, still a steal-the-show girl. But she's been through teenage hell, all thanks to Cricket Bell. Now it's make or break it, for a relationship. But she still has a boyfriend. Did I forget to mention him? Her path is undefined, she's losing half her mind. She's in a bind and in a crunch. Now she's about to lose her lunch!
At Lola's, Lola Nolan's Casa. The best fun since Etienne and Anna. At Lola's, Lola Nolan's Casa. Hair clips and lashes and grand high school dances. At Lola's... Does she get her love? Does she get her love?
This book blew me away with... a Masquerade Ball, reincarnation, slyph, drA gorgeous YA utopian tale! Nope, not dystopian. Do you know the difference?
This book blew me away with... a Masquerade Ball, reincarnation, slyph, dragons, music, souls, butterfly, slow burn romance, tension, laser pistols, massive library, war stories, dragon battles. Need I go on? I mean - Wow.
I read this in a flurry of addiction. I just couldn't get enough of the world and it's goings-ons. Completely entrancing.
The Rundown
Ana was born into a society of a million souls. A million souls who have known each other in various forms for thousands of years. They reincarnate into a new body every time they die. Except for when Ana was born. When Ana was born, they were expecting one of their own, someone named Ciana, who was now lost forever. Ana's mother hates her for taking the place of Ciana and is ashamed, so she moves her new baby outside the city and locks her away from all the others. Now, Ana is eighteen and on a quest to the city of Heart to find out about her birth and Ciana's disappearance. Will she find the answers she seeks?
The Writing
The author's prose has a very subtle lyricism, and the underlying message of this book seemed to be one of peace and hope for the future, which is a happy change from bleak and desolate outcomes of some recent dystopian fiction.
The main character, Ana, gets things done. The questions Ana posed to herself in her head were realistic and it was refreshing to have a character who asks questions and goes against the grain instead of settling for everyone-else-knows-best. The love interest, Sam, was complex, intriguing and a hottie!
The romance developed at a (GASP!) realistic pace, more so than most paranormal YA. It wasn't all "You looked at me like you LIKE me, so LETSBETOGETHERFOREVER!" I was afraid that it would feel cardboard or manufactured like some recent YA romances have. But it didn't. It felt natural and ended up being higher tension and surprisingly steamier than I had imagined for such a PG book.
Although few and far between, there were some unobtrusive religious, or possibly even anti-religious, undertones. The thing was that I couldn't tell. I couldn't see an agenda hidden behind the words and I appreciate that. These undertones were woven in delicately and did not overwhelm the world or the characters. It seemed to be more about raising the questions, instead of forcing an answer on you.
Should you believe in something you can't see? That's one of the questions it raises. Novels should be able to raise questions without imposing the author's answers onto on unsuspecting readers. Books should make you think and learn and discover the answers for yourselves. I felt this one did that pitch perfectly.
One complaint I do have, however, is the lack of dialog tags; oftentimes, it was necessary to reread passages over and over to figure out who was saying what. But that might just be my ADD talking. *sings* It's the FINAL COUNTDOWN. Doodoodoo. Wait, what was I saying...
The World-Building
A fresh and unique twist on the mythology of reincarnation. Finally! It is handled beautifully and seems intensely creative. But I want more! I'm so excited to learn more from the next books in the series.
In actuality, there are SO many interesting things you could do with this society. What if the same couple had been together for ten lifetimes but in the next, one just isn't attracted at ALL to the other. Oh, the scandal!
Even though I love the reincarnation concept used by Jodi Meadows, it still weirds me out a bit. Statistically someone who had been your lover in a past life could end up being your parent in the next....or vice versa. *shudder*
In general, I still have so many questions about the world-building. It was exciting and unique, but I wanted more details. More answers.
But I guess we don't know everything about even our favorite mythologies. Like what the hell are midichlorians (besides "bacteria") and how do they work? And WHY can't Darth Vader teleport? I mean, if the Weasley Twins can do it, why can't the original Dark Lord do it?
Regardless, I LOVED Incarnate. I inhaled it. This is definitely more of a 4.5, but it could have been a 5 if the ending had been more dynamic.
I was expecting something more emotionally heart-wrenching. Break my heart into pieces and then put them back together just in time for the last sentence. Give us a huge reveal, more answers, something epic, something shocking, something weep-worthy! However, it just didn't quite do that for me, but I'm hoping that the next books in the series will.
Keep in mind that this is a series. The story comes off at times as a mish mash of genres and ideas. So if you are for streamlined world-building and definitive answers, you might wait on this one. I'm hoping all is explained in the upcoming books but even I still have MANY questions.
I CANNOT WAIT to read the sequels.
Just look at this word cloud. How can a book with this word cloud NOT be awesome?
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There's only one thing it needs: NINJAS! Because if I had lived for over 5000 years already, I would definitely have learned to be a ninja by now.
This is basically the paranormal version of Misty of Chincatigue with (gasp!) romance!
Like Hidalgo, on the beach insteaAlso posted on STRANGEMORE.COM.
This is basically the paranormal version of Misty of Chincatigue with (gasp!) romance!
Like Hidalgo, on the beach instead of the desert with (gasp!) kissing! Between two riders! NOT between the horse and it's rider though. Well... sometimes between the horse and it's rider. Just a little.
When this book started, it felt like a breath of fresh sea air, not rife with the smell of YA cliche. That was mainly because I thought this book was told from the alternating perspective of two boys, Sean and Puck, which would have been a nice change for Steifvater. Maybe I was in the mood for a buddy story or a brother story, instead of the usual stereotypical romance. But it wasn't meant to be, you see, because Puck is a SHE and not a he. (Sorry, my inner Dr Suess came out for a second.)
Not that this is a spoiler or anything, as it it mentioned fairly quickly. It was just something my mind was set against. I wanted Puck to be a boy. I'm tired of the "here's a girl who does this and here's a boy who does that, hmmmm, I wonder when and how they'll meet and, gee, wouldn't it be weird if they fell in love, because, oh boy, we've never seen THAT happen before."
The Rundown
I understand now why the blurb is so impossibly vague. This is a difficult book to sum up.
Two individuals, Sean and Puck, are preparing separately for the annual Scorpio Races (where the dangerous water horses of Thisby face off against each other with their riders and generally lots of bloodshed) until their lives eventually collide into each other. Sean is the typical Thisby teen boy who just so happens to compete every year in the races. Puck is a young girl having some family issues, in particular with her brother's desire to leave the family home and the island that they live on, and she thinks that competing in the Races will force her brother to stick around. But Puck decides to race her regular horse against the blood-thirsty water horses, which cause quite a stir and tons of problems. And that's just the beginning.
The Writing and World-Building
If there was one word to describe this book, it would definitely be "atmospheric." The descriptions were gorgeous, but the location for the book is more than a little mind boggling. It seems to be a created fantasy island located in Ireland? I think. The term they use for the water horses is a Gaelic term but it takes place on a fictional island, I guess? The specifics are never really laid out about where or what or when this "Thisby" is.
Many reviewers raised concerns about the lack of world-building in the Maggie's Wolves of Mercy Falls series. That being said, I feel like she almost went in the opposite direction with way too much world-building, including tiny details about minor characters, and it honestly wasn't very interesting to me. The characters all had their own quirks and backgrounds, but we were told too much and too often about them. More than was necessary.
However, the world that she built around The Scorpio Races was much better than the world of Mercy Falls. The prose isn't quite as purple and the romance isn't nearly as cheddar. I'd say it's more like a magenta colby jack. It was just a very bland and tasteless magenta colby jack.
The Pacing
Pacing was my biggest problem with The Scorpio Races. It takes at least 100 pages or so before anything remotely interesting happens. Usually by then, I would have put a book down not knowing whether or not I would pick it back up, but because this is an upcoming release, I felt like I needed to keep going. In addition, because of the way the environments are described and the action builds slowly, a certain intrigue simmers in your mind and drives you forward regardless of the slow start. But I'm not entirely sure that the pay-off was worth the anticipation.
Around page 380, the seemingly fabled races begin. Now that would have been a great place to start the book! Because up until that point almost NOTHING had happened. It was all setup. I'm sorry, but I do not need three hundred and eighty pages of setup. Even if it has pretty words and HORSES!!!
Because by the time that part finally came around and I thought, "Now this could be interesting," -- it was much too late. I was looooong past mentally checked out and had become disinvested and disinterested.
This might come off rude, but this is the best way I know how too explain what it seems like has happened.
You know when a little girl first discovers the way her skirt twirls when she spins? It's cute, right?! You're like, "Oh, isn't that precious. She's twirling." But then it's two weeks later and she's STILL twirling like the world won't be able to turn itself if she stops, you're like "Okay, we get it! You can twirl" But you can't say that because then you're just being an asshole for ruining a little girl's "twirl time."
Well, Maggie Steifvater can twirl... and whirl... and swirl... and canter... and whinny. It just seems like the author discovered for the first time "Wow, I can write pretty prose. Let's throw some more of that in there."
Don't get me wrong: It is pretty. But holy well of words, do we need SO much of it?
The Scorpio Races don't actually happen until the last 20 or 30 pages of the book, and even then, the actual Races only last about 12 pages, the rest is aftermath. For a book that's 410 pages long, that is not a good chunk of the content. Only about 3 percent of it, in fact. Maybe it should have been titled "The 380 pages leading up to the Scorpio races".
I mean, sure, Hunger Games had some setup as well. But it would have been an entirely different book had the Games only lasted 12 pages.
Who Should or Should Not Read It
I wouldn't read this book again. And I wouldn't recommend it for a lot of people. But I think a lot of people will read it anyway.
Here's why: 1) It is written by Maggie Stiefvater. 2) It is a paranormal written by Maggie Stiefvater. 3) It is a paranormal written by Maggie Stiefvater about HORSES! HORSES! HORSES! HORSES! HORSES! HORSES! 254) It is a standalone. (Finally!)
If you hated Shiver, then you'll probably hate this one as well. If you loved Shiver, then you might love this one.
Right around the time that the Black Beauty movie with Chris O'Donnell came out, I went through horse phase like many young girls probably do. But I got over it and I think I'm still over it, which might be why I didn't love this book. I also went through a dog phase, Old Yeller, Rin Tin Tin, Turner and Hooch, except that I never grew out of it and never will.
I think Horse People will love this book. Keep in mind that there is a big difference between liking horses and being a Horse Person. I like horses. They are pretty and I like to imagine them with horns or wings or gills, but my thoughts don't revolve around them. I am a Dog Person.
I've heard people say that horses are like really big dogs, but I think that those people are just Horse People trying to convince you to be a Horse Person. When really, it's like comparing Chihuahuas to Labradors. Some people say that small dogs and big dogs are the same. They aren't. Not even close. Usually, those who say that are Small Dog People trying to convince you to be a Small Dog Person. This isn't to say that any of them are better or worse than the other, they are just different. I am a Big Dog person, not a Horse Person, not a Small Dog Person.
If this had been about magical sea-faring German Shepherds, I would have LOVED it.... probably.
Other Thoughts
The one thing I really like about what Maggie did with this book, though the same may not be said for Shiver, is that she didn't follow the pack with The Scorpio Races. After the vampire-werewolf craze hit and SMeyer announced on her website that she was writing a mermaid book, strangely, we saw a surge in the number of mermaid based books on the market, many of a questionable quality due to the fact that they were most likely rushed onto the shelves. Maggie didn't go with the surge but she didn't go against it either. She went along side it by creating her own mythology similar to many ocean based tales. It wouldn't be surprising if we see a rise in ocean based mythology books after The Scorpio Races.
Although the pacing is slower and the story not quite as involving as Shiver, this book still seems to be a step in a better direction (albeit almost too far a step) for Maggie. The world-building is much more fully realized and detailed than that of Shiver and the storyline isn't purely romance based, which leads me to think that maybe, just maybe, authors do pay attention to reviewers complaints. Maybe she just decided to put more time into her world-building on her own, or maybe, hopefully, we are having some minuscule effect on how the book world evolves. And that makes me very VERY happy.
The Verdict
The Wolves of Mercy Falls was just a little too soft for me and the Scorpio Races was just a little too hard, so maybe by the time the next book comes around from Ms Stiefavter, that one will be juuuuust right for this little goldilocks.
I'm giving it two stars because it was written well, just badly paced and plotted, in my opinion. The pretty words weren't enough to make up for the boredom. And unfortunately, I never connected to the characters or the romance between them.
The thing that frustrates me the most about books is when feel like I didn't learn anything. I don't really mind not being entertained if I take something away from it that I had never thought about before. But I at least want one or the other.
If you aren't going to entertain me, then teach me something. If you aren't going to teach me something, then by George Washington, at least ENTERTAIN me!! I'm very sorry to say that this book did neither. But that isn't to say that you will feel the same.
Personally, I didn't love it. I don't think I even liked it, but it wasn't terribly written; it wasn't too terribly involving either.
Meh. That's my word for this book. Or rather more like -
MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAH.
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Yeah, I just whinnied. Whatcha gonna do about it, huh?...more
Summer. It doesn't always have to be about mermaids and unicorns.
Sometimes, it just about a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him not to smSummer. It doesn't always have to be about mermaids and unicorns.
Sometimes, it just about a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him not to smash her sandcastle. And sometimes, that boy smashes it anyway.
But not in this book - in this one, they frikkin build sandcastles. One of them: a replica of the Sydney Opera House. Damn right.
In her small beach town, Anna meets and falls fast head over heels for Will, the boy from the city. She gets wrapped up in the magic of spending summer with her new squeeze and nearly forgets that he will be leaving by the end of the season. But he will leave. She knows she will have to deal with that and starts to pull away from him. Somehow, Will manages to win her over with his wiley charms, anyway.
The love interest's name is Will Cooper, which of course made me think of Will Grayson and Tiny Cooper from Will Grayson Will Grayson. If there are any "regular people" fictional characters out there that I loved, it's them. So then I got all nostalgic and junk.
Sixteenth Summer is fairly basic, not a lot of melodrama, but it evokes the feel of summer and perfectly captures the mind of a teenager during the season of short-lived-sappy romances. At one point in the book, the MC spent about 5 pages talking about a bathing suit wrap to wear to the beach, but with the voice she used, she managed to make it at least slightly interesting, or at least not as outright boring as it could have been. So that, in and of itself, is a feat. Especially coming from me, who has zero interest in fashion. A graphic tee and jeans for me, please.
Sixteenth Summer is perfect for those out there that go giddy and googly-eyed over the sap. This was sappy as Pooh's honey tree.
There are longing stares over campfire, scoops of ice cream galore, and a LOT of happy love thoughts. This felt too much like a generic relationship. Girl sees boy across the way. Boy meets girl's eyes. A few days later they see each other again. Boy asks girl out. Boy and girl get to know each other. I guess I am just more of a fan of slow developing relationships: Anti-generic relationships, best friends that become lovers, or a love-hate relationship. Not like-at-first-sight romances.
The one thing that I really liked was the fact this book told a clean, angst-free summer romance. The truth is that not all relationship are Dr Phil-worthy. And not all teens only think about to who and when they are going to lose their virginity or dwell constantly on the fact that they are virgins. In fact, I don't think this book ever mentioned sex. It may be rare, yes. But it is entirely possible.
Sometimes, relationships are just about learning to be. Or learning to be together. That's what this book is. It isn't fantastical or epic or even highly dramatic. It's just simply about a connection between two people.
What I didn't like
• A little too perfect until the last 50 pages or so • Too much lovey-dovey, not enough grit • Generic summer romance
What I liked
• Little baby sea turtles hatching and venturing into the ocean • Möbius strip bracelet • Nearly angst free • Strong female with her own separate life and sense of purpose
All in all, it was just too perfect. If you are looking for a perky and uppity summer romance with very little angst, then I really think you would love this. Very cute. Liked it, didn't love it.
This is a perfect book for younger teen girls, I think. If you constantly find yourself singing, "Huh. Tell me more, tell me more. Was it love at first sight?" and wishing that Danny Zuko was a good boy and that Grease was about the summer before Sandy transferred to Ridell High, then this book would be your let's-go-for-a-midnight-roll-in-the-sand-while-giggling-and-watching-sea-turtles-babies-run-free DREAM.
(Thanks to S&S for letting me read this as an ARC!)...more
I was really excited to read a book about summer camp. But I'm just not sure that this one tickled my fancy camp slippers (with matching pajamas, of cI was really excited to read a book about summer camp. But I'm just not sure that this one tickled my fancy camp slippers (with matching pajamas, of course).
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With a camp story, you expect: the grand arson of marshmellows at the end of woodland sticks, songs of kumbaya and jolly good fellows, spaghetti food fights, and zombie-apocalypse-survival-training (Wait, that last one might have just been part of my delusions while I was at camp).
But this was a lot of running around, talking, whining and complaining, and more not-so-intriguing things.
I went into this book expecting something like the sisters version of Invincible Summer at camp, instead of the beach. But this was not nearly as entertaining as it could have been.
Summer of Firsts and Lasts follows three sisters who are seemingly distinct in personality but not distinct enough in their voices. And guess what? Their names are THEMED! Yay! I love it when that happens. *coughNOTcough*
Their names are: Calla, Daisy, and Violet. Barf. Okay, again. They aren't bad names by any means but I just absolutely hate it when characters in books have "themed" names or similar names, because I can't frikkin keep them straight. And this time, there are three of them. I had a hard enough time with Harmony and Melody in Bumped.
I would forget which sister was narrating and would only figure it out by the people she was with or the other sisters they mention. Like "Okay, so she just mentioned Daisy and Violet, so then Calla is talking." However, I'm notoriously book ADD, so maybe this was my own fault for not paying enough attention.
The amount of nicknames was unbearable, considering the complete lack of consistency in which they were used. Each sister would use two or three different nicknames for each of the other sisters: Violet is Vi and ViVi. Calla is Cal and Cow. Daisy is Daze, Dizzy, Zee and ZeeZee. And I think somebody is Bot or Shaz, or maybe Shaz was a stand-in for a cuss word. I can't really remember or, at the time, I couldn't tell.
There seemed to be too much attention paid to the precise sequence of events and exactly what EVERYONE was doing ALL the time, as well as what everyone was wearing or talking about, or saying about the other minor characters. Sometimes when there are too many details in a book, it can seem not genuine. Not nearly enough character building, setting, or description was involved. None of the boys were swoon worthy. Even one of the main romances developed completely "off screen" and we never really experience it first hand.
Mainly, what I really missed was the ambiance of camp. I wanted to feel the campfire's heat crackling against my forearm and smell the crisp sweet scent of roasting marshmallows. This book never quite did that for me.
Personally, I didn't enjoy this very much, but if you miss the good ol' days of summer camp, give this book a shot. You might like it, anyway.
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In another way, reading this book was a completely surreal and somewhat nostalgic experience. I apologize in advance, because this part of the review may not be relevant to many of you.
There were a lot of characters in this book with names that are the same as a lot of my Goodreads friends. I almost felt like I was at Goodreads camp...
The sister named Daisy is besties with Flannery and this Flannery in the book loves playing twenty questions. Hmmmm, that doesn't sound familiar at all. But she puts a sadistic spin on it. Everytime you guess wrong you get dunked and held under the water in the lake. Are we sure this is fiction? Geez. Another favorite game of the book Flannery - Would You Rather.
Apart from her, there is also a Jill, Olivia, Lucy, Jessica, April, Emily, Kelly and Joel. Then all of a sudden, other names that are similar to goodreads friends names started morphing into their names in my mind. Deena into Tina. Sally into Sandy. Steffie to Stef. Jordan to Morgan. It was so weird.
Really, the only thing that kept me semi-involved in this book was the names coincidence.
I kept thinking about how much fun we would all have together at camp or on vacation or some crazy crap like that. And wishing we all could have grown up around each other... Or at least that I could have grown up around people more like all of you.
Do people even go camping or to summer camp anymore? The Great Outdoors? Never heard of it.
Here's an attempt to get a Goodreader to go camping:
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(Thanks to S&S for allowing me to read this as an ARC.)...more
What is it about family drama that speaks to us all so deeply? I know why it effects me. As an only child, peace and quiet was the norm fFamily drama.
What is it about family drama that speaks to us all so deeply? I know why it effects me. As an only child, peace and quiet was the norm for my household. I craved the hug of an older sister or the pranks of a younger brother. Craved anything. Any new and exciting family dynamic.
So I wonder - is drama essential in a large family? Is it inevitable? I have recently been privy to some of the drama of my Dad's large yet scattered family. While I yearn to know what it is like to feel the comradery of siblings, I don't wish for the intensity that comes along with the heated arguments.
Does drama just come with the territory? Is it all worth it?
Invincible Summer explores some of these questions. The massive cast is introduced quickly and all at once in the beginning, which leads to a rather difficult time of sorting everyone out. Once you advance in the story, it becomes much easier and you can even determine who's speaking without needing to be told. Every character is unique and well-defined.
The only rather annoying quirk was how often the dialogue involved quotes by the family's favorite author, Albert Camus. Clearly, the author's writing and his quotes are lovely, but I didn't find it quite believable that 15 to 18 year old boys would actually quote anyone that often.
Beautifully and simply told from the perspective of a young man named Chase over the course of several summers. Starting with the age of fifteen up until eighteen, he struggles through the birth of a new baby, the trials of having a deaf brother, and the complexities of girls. He deeply experiences doubts, regrets, and loss. But he also experiences love.
All this tension is heightened by the presense and, even more often, by the absense of his best friend and older brother, Noah. The story doesn't presume to be all that funny or highly suspenseful, but it can entrap you all the same.
The cover of this book is entirely misleading. It is no sunny romp on the beach. There is a love triangle that doesn't feel like a love triangle. There is grit, sand, and sea, but mostly there is sex, anger, and angst. It is emotional in a completely raw and realistic fashion.
This book is about how the love of a family is simple, yet endlessly complicated. The complicated part is figuring out why you love them. The simple part is that you do.
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Thanks to Simon and Schuster for allowing me to read this as an ARC!!
Content warning: Heavy language and some sexual content....more
Okay FINE. This book isn't actually about a blonde chick with a door to an alternate universe in her head, but the plot line is just as [image]
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Okay FINE. This book isn't actually about a blonde chick with a door to an alternate universe in her head, but the plot line is just as equally contrived.
Gwen and Vic are our two protagonists, and they are also "twin" cousins. This means that their dads are brothers, and their moms are sisters. Yeah - two brothers married two sisters and each couple had a child. I'm not sure if I should be creeped out by that. In fact, I found myself thinking about it often throughout the book and whether or not it should be weird. I don't think it should, but for some reason it seems like it would be.
So, the kids inadvertently stumble into their Uncle/Dad's alternate universe machine and discover a whole new world. The inhabitants of this world are at war with a race of beings called Merlons. Dun, dun, dun...
When I was in middle school, I loved the Young Jedi Knights series (which would make an amaaaaazing TV show!!) that was written by the same authors. It's fair to say that I was obsessed. Now, I'm not sure if I was just to blinded by thoughts like "COOL JEDI TRAINING!!" to see the sad truth about it. The writing is rife with overused and unnessecary words and breaks off topic so easily that it's ridiculous. Maybe this was fine for me during my peak ADD years, but now I need a lot more.
Obviously a juvenile book, The Crystal Door is full of cliches, adjectives, adverbs, words like cerulean and magenta being used to describe the sky and the ocean, evil things, cheesy dialogue, and many other marks of books targeted to younger readers.
In it's entirety, it was fun, cute, and quick, but not a world where I would want to spend a huge amount of time. So it's a good thing that these books are short.
However, it was funny at times and might make a good choice if you are in the mood for a middle grade book!...more
When I was young 'un, we had this storytelling board game in our house. If memory serves me right, it was called, simply, "Once..."
The basis of the gaWhen I was young 'un, we had this storytelling board game in our house. If memory serves me right, it was called, simply, "Once..."
The basis of the game was to create a story from a card prompt and people had to guess whether it was true or not - or something like that anyway.
As many things do, at first this game went over my head a bit. *swoosh* Because in my everyday life, whenever I would try to make up a story (or more accurately - what you might call a white lie) to my friends or family, they always seemed to know right away. At least my mom, who I had convinced myself was secretly a CIA agent, always knew.
But I eventually figured out that when it is turned into a game, this "storytelling" phenomenon can actually be quite fun, because apparently if you are being upfront about this thing called "fiction" being "not real", then it is perfectly acceptable and not something you have to be nervous about. Around that time, I started to get very good at it.
So anyway, I played this game with my friends, and at one point, I told a gruesome story about how, just the previous week, I had seen a cat torture and kill a baby bird, basically skinning it alive. A fairly traumatic thing for a young girl to witness. Of course, everyone assumed that I had actually seen it happen, because what kid could just make something like that up? Well apparently, a kid with a sick mind. I had made it up.
With an incredibly active and visual imagination, not to mention, a little bit of craziness thrown in for good measure, I had actually seen this scene happen solely in my mind's eye. So, I didn't technically just make up the story on the fly; rather, as a result seeing a smushed dead baby bird lying on the street, my mind went on to imagine how this might have happened. Thus, I received the previously stated disturbing mental image.
I am about 99.98646362728% certain that most people's minds don't work this way. I think maybe you need to be at least a little bit of a paranoid schizophrenic to be a storyteller. At least, that's how I explain my strange mental processes to myself.
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This book, entitled Once, is about a young Jewish boy, named Felix, living and suffering through the horrid times of the Holocaust. He has been hidden away in an orphanage and has convinced himself that his parents are still around and just waiting for the right moment to come and get him. When they don't show up after three years, Felix sets out to find them and meets new friends and new trouble.
The little boy loves to tell stories and does so throughout almost the entire book. He isn't what you might think of as an "unreliable narrator", however. He is always upfront with the reader, so though he may tell "stories" to the other characters, he never does with us. A true unreliable narrator is more like what you would find in the Fight Club, where the reader isn't given all the necessary information and much is withheld.
The things that happen to and around Felix in this book are terrifyingly unbelievable. It is easy to tell yourself that things like this could never happen. But they have. They are. They will.
The prose is simple and heart-wrenching. The writing is in no way strenuous, but the story is. Worry and heartache will easily overcome you in this book. It should be difficult to believe that human beings are capable of such atrocities but somehow, it isn't that difficult to imagine.
We should be able to look at a book like this and say "No one would ever be capable of doing that." But we can't.
Overall, this was an excellent story about a young boy suffering through a horrible time in history. It certainly pulls at your heart strings, but I wouldn't quite call it life changing. This book comes off more like a deeply and darkly intense fable.
The books is a short 163 pages, and the final chapter leaves it somewhat open-ended. Just enough so, that it you leaves you asking questions but still gives you a bit of closure. Happy-endings are not readily available within Holocaust fiction, unfortunately.
This is kind of book that resonates. It stays with you and keeps your mind working long after you have finished.
If you are interested, the hardcover is currently the cheapest way to obtain this book at just under 7 dollars on Amazon. The Kindle edition is very pricey at 10 dollars, especially for such a short book.
The thing I loved most about this book is that throughout most of it, Felix has an uplifting and optimistic personality. It was so entertaining as well as endearing to hear his thoughts and views on the world. He is an amazing character and a new favorite of mine. His viewpoint reminded me ever so slightly of the main character in The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime, in the way that he notices things and sees things in a manner that most would not.
At one point in the book, Felix sees Nazis burning Jewish books, so he becomes convinced that the Nazis are doing all of this because the Nazis hate the Jews' books and not just them. So in order to make sense of it all, he tells himself a story about how in a book warehouse in another country, one day a bunch of Jewish books fell on top of someone's kids and crushed them. So these people vowed to take revenge on the books and anyone who owns them.
It is truly remarkable the creations that a mind can invent to explain that which it does not know.
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On another note, I have searched high and low on the Internet for another edition of the "Once..." game that I played as a kid and have been entirely unsucessful in finding it.
I'm beginning to think that maybe my CIA agent mother had a single copy designed and produced in order to help cultivate my imagination. See, now that doesn't sound at ALL unreasonable to me. But that's just how I roll......more
Please take this review with a grain of salt. Go ahead, I'll give you a second to go and find your salt shaker...
Just take this for what it is.[image]
Please take this review with a grain of salt. Go ahead, I'll give you a second to go and find your salt shaker...
Just take this for what it is. A sarcastic and fun review of an absolutely adorable children's book. Obviously, I don't truly believe that there is blatant sexual innuendo or anything of the sort in this book.
But I also apparently do have a sick, sick, mind.
Noddy is a little toy who just moved into a new house. He has no money and no job, but he still needs the basic necessities of a happy toy life. So first things first, he makes friends with the milkman.
And so Noddy's strange tale begins. So do some really questionable undertones about the relationship between Noddy and his milkman!!
Let me bobble your head and I'll give you free milk??!?!?! Really?!
I'm sure that I'm imagining things, but is that not strange in any context? Regardless I digress, NO kid in the intended age group is going to think twice about that. They will think it's hilarious, like I did, without even noticing the double entendre. And if for some strange reason they do, you can always jump into a conversation about Stranger Danger! Everything can become a learning opportunity with Noddy!
One thing that I truly relate to Noddy over. He is very cheap. Granted - letting the milkman "bobble your head" for free milk is a little iffy. But the kid is frugal, and that I can respect. He gets his free used furniture by doing a little spring cleaning for some townsfolk. He saves money and pays back his debts like every good responsible little toy should.
You hear that Buzz?! I still haven't gotten back that quarter that I stashed in his helmet yet. And it's been at least ten years. The jerk took off with my Princess Leia action figure never to be seen again. Geez, the nerve of some miniature plastic humanoids!
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On with the story: Noddy gets a job working with cars and before he knows it, goblins are stealing the cars right out from under him. Don't you hate it when that happens? Now he needs to try and get the cars back. I'm not going to spoil the specifics of how, but it shouldn't surprise you when I say there is absolutely no violence and the thieves get off pretty easy.
I mean, really, Noddy couldn't slay a goblin if the Powers That Be deemed him the chosen one and bestowed upon him the Slayer's Scythe.
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Not even Joss Whedon could make this kid into a killer! And he made WILLOW a power-mad, murdering, maniac trying to take over the world! WILLOW!!
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Okay. So Noddy isn't much of a beast.
Wait - I'm getting something here (with my apparent telepathic Internet skills)...
What's that you say, Flannery? You think he COULD slay demons? You've seen it. He was spinning and kicking and slaying vampires left and right. Really? Spike was there, too? AND you snapped a picture?! That's amazing - Let's see it:
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Oh my gawd, they killed Buffy!! Or maybe that's Harmony. I can't tell - all us white girls look the same in MS paint.
Oh, and the vampire is doing jazz hands as he is dying. Either that or he is very happy to have been staked.
Regardless, I stand corrected. Noddy is totally a slayer.
[image] Wow, Spike better watch out. He has some competition...
So now I will proceed to spoil the ending for you. I mean, come on, it's a kid's book. Like it's not going to have a happy ending.
"He got back our cars, so now he shall have one for himself."
Also, Noddy has a very nice sized car, totally proportionate to his body. If you know what I mean... Wink, wink. Nudge, nudge.
So completely despite myself, I had waaaaaay too much fun reading this kid's book. It's adorable, somewhat inspiring, responsible, and surprisingly hilarious.
If you can - just picture me, sitting in my oversized sleeper/recliner, cuddled up in my Snuggie, pointing and laughing at the book every time I turned the page.
Ah man, now I have Snuggie fuzz all over these colorful little pages! Damn you, cheaply made As Seen on TV merchandise that I can't seem to bring myself to throw away even though it's crap! It's just so practical.
So, Melody and Harmony are our two main characters. And guess what - they're twins! Naw....really?!
Not that they are bad names, but twins named MelodySo, Melody and Harmony are our two main characters. And guess what - they're twins! Naw....really?!
Not that they are bad names, but twins named Melody and Harmony?! Cliche much?
The similar names also made it very difficult to keep straight on who was who. The perspective jumps back and forth between the two of them just about every couple pages or so. The breakneck speed of the switches makes it difficult to develop a connection to the characters or keep track of what in the heehaw is goin' on. (Sorry, when I get frustrated - the Southern comes out.)
So Melody, or is it Harmony, or Symphony. No, I think it's Rhythm. Hell, I can't keep them straight, so I will call them Future Twin, who is the first one we are introduced to and uses excessive amounts of future slang, and Religious Twin, who is the second and religious fanatic type.
Future Twin and Religious Twin are sixteen and are just meeting for the first time. Future Twin has loaned out her body to "bump" and then deliver a baby to sell to the highest bidder. Religious Twin has come to find her and save her soul. Religious Twin then proceeds to impersonate Future Twin when the guy who's supposed to "bump" her comes around, because she somehow believes this will help save Future Twin's soul. But instead a whole lot of complicated things start to happen...
Right off the bat, the "lingo" hit me like a back-handed slap from my momma. Okay, so I don't actually call her Momma. And my mom would never really hit me. Except for that one time. She threatened to spank me with a wooden spoon and then she DID. Yeah, I laughed too... while she was doing it. Anywho. (Oh hey! There's my Northerner side. (view spoiler)[No, I'm not schizophrenic. (view spoiler)[Just a Heinz 57 from a mix of places in the US. (hide spoiler)](hide spoiler)])
The future speak in this book annoyed the heck out of me and the religious speak annoyed the HELL out of me.
In the Part One, they had some new madey-upy biofrantonkulous slangifiedness almost every third or fourth word. It just didn't flow right. It felt forced and stunted; not to mention, it made me dry-heavey with all the neggy-and-preggy-fullification.
Then there is the religious speak. "If I serve well." "Complete faith in my faith." "Oh my Grace." "Majestic." "Glorious." "Halleluyah!" "Not a place of righteousness." "Do you have God?"
I have absolutely nothing against a religious mentality. I am myself a very spiritual person, but this was just too much. Growing up in Christian schools my entire life, I know first hand that teenagers, especially, just do not talk like that. Maybe in some extremist circumstances, but STILL it is horribly annoying.
Religious Twin actually compares her love interest to...... You guessed it...... JESUS! She says something to the effect of "He looks the way Jesus does in my dreams." And she wants to do Jesus. This takes the whole everything-glorious-and-perfect-love-interest thing to an entirely new and disturbing level. Yes, and the guy she compares to Jesus is the same guy that called having sex with her - "pro-boner" work.
The only semi-normal, semi-acceptable, semi-catchy phrase to come out of this: For serious.
Maybe this part of the book would resonate more with younger teen girls, who still have delusions of mystery surrounding the complexities of inventing new slang and get a thrill from deciphering what their friend's "secret codes" say. But I'm over it. Unless it feels natural and relative to the fictional world. To me, this didn't. Maybe I'm just too old for this shiznit.
In Part One, we experience something called reverse info-dumping. Pages and pages of indistinct and unexplained terminology and culture references. Then at the beginning of Part Two and about one quarter into the book, the writing takes a fairly drastic turn. The laughably overabundant slang use subsides and becomes bearable. Yet still not entirely believable.
Another problem is the subject matter. I feel it is almost too sensitive for preteens, so I'm left wondering what demographic this is aimed at. The written material is too sexualized for the young, but the writing itself is almost too young for anyone older.
And considering the title seems to basically be a YA-friendly version of "F***ed", I'm really not sure this is a good choice for preteens. It is hazy on whether or not "bumped" means to "have sex with" or to "get pregnant with" or both combined into one word. As this quote from Zen, one of the love interests, demonstrates: "Insufficient verticality. No one pays to bump with a guy who's five-foot-seven-and-a-half."
Finally in about the last five pages, it is made somewhat clearer that to "bump" is to impregnate. But, geez, was that really so difficult?
With such a grim premise, humans not being able to procreate after the age of eighteen, I guess I was expecting a darker aura about the book. It feels much too light and fluffy.
Both girls are shallow, only thinking of either getting pregnant or serving the Lord. I remember being a teenager, since it wasn't that long ago; most teens have so much more on their minds than that. It just wasn't believable at all.
I will admit to giggling quite a bit, but usually it was over the ridiculousness of the slang and the shallow characterizations of the girls.
Religion plays a large role in this book and the one idea that I really related to is that you can turn away from the church without turning away from your faith. This point was raised to Religious Twin toward the end of the book.
I completely recognize and understand that people WILL like this. I think a large part of the audience will be curious younger girls just starting to get interested in sexual activity.
My biggest problem is the feel of the book. It seems too perky and wow-look-how-great-it-is-to-be-pregnant for a large part of the book. It rarely seems to imply that being a pregnant teen is not all rainbows and butterfly kisses. In order to get that message across, the entire book would need to be infinitely darker. But I do think that a lot of teen girls will find this super fun.
Personally, I found that I was constantly wanting to smack myself to see if I was dreaming this ridiculousness. Because I wanted to like it. I really, really wanted to like it.
And the ending! Really? Gee, I wasn't expecting them to try and turn another YA book, that should be a standalone, into a series!! Are they STILL doing that?
Now, don't get me wrong.
I am not saying that you shouldn't read this. I just don't think it is a great choice for younger teens. I am left a little confused on who the exact intended audience is, but regardless, it's up to you whether or not to read this. It depends on how you view the reading experience and what you care to devote that reading time to.
I, personally, almost never feel like reading time is wasted, even if I don't particularly care for a book. Because often, you come away from it with a little extra "youness". What I mean is this: every book can help shape who you are or who you become. If you let it.
Usually, there's something you can take away from a book, whether you liked it or not. Even if it is just learning a little something about yourself that you didn't know before.
Honestly, though. I CANNOT wait to see some of the things my fellow Goodreaders will say about this book in their reviews and, especially, in their status updates. For serious!
So I am officially starting "Bumped" Watch 2011.
So I can "Oooh" and "Ahhh" over all the Goodreaders who officially get their first Bumped review this year.
"Oh my gawd, look how cute that little Bumped review is." "How does she look so good with that HUGE Bumped review?" "I wonder who the Daddy of that Bumped review is?"
Oh yeah. Almost forgot. (This book was provided to me as a review copy by Netgalley and HarperCollins. Thanks!)...more
Yeah, that is a fairly decent representation of what I thought when I first saw the title for this book.
AfteSleeping Beauty: VAMPIRE SLAYER?!?!
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Yeah, that is a fairly decent representation of what I thought when I first saw the title for this book.
After I got over my shock, I was like "AWESOME!"
Then my eyes glazed over as I went "click happy" on Netgalley, requesting everything in sight, all because of this book. That's what the term "Vampire Slayer" does to me. It turns me into a consumer zombie.
[image] Although, I'm not quite as legendary with my zombie wardrobe selection.
I feel like an addict who wakes up surrounded by drugs and passed out women, except that in my case - I'm now surrounded by ARCs that I have to read and review. Wonderful. When did being an addict become so much damn work? Fortunately, I love ARCs!
This was actually a fairly interesting take on the classic Sleeping Beauty myth.
Lucette is born to her mother and father, the King and Queen. A curse is placed on her and her people by the queen of vampires. The curse will trigger if Lucette pricks her finger on anything - but preferably on a rose, the flower with fangs.
If the curse is triggered, their daughter will only wake at dusk and fall asleep at dawn, while all her people will wake at dawn and and fall asleep at dusk, leaving Lucette all alone in an eternity of night. The fairy council places a counter spell upon the girl, protecting her from the curse until she is 16. The only way to reverse the curse, once triggered, is if Lucette can prove that she has found true love.
But how can she possibly find true love if all the men are asleep while she is awake?! Hmmmmm, I might have a suggestion:
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I think the operative word for this book is.... Charming.
I want to say that this is more middle grade and I probably would have really enjoyed it around age 10 or 11, but it just feels too juvenile for me, now. Maybe it's because I'm not in the right demographic for this book, but I felt that characters didn't have quite enough depth.
The prose is simple and to the point. It was a fairly inventive modern fairytale, yet not all that enthralling.
At the time of requesting this, I didn't realize that this was a choose-your-own-adventure type book. I don't think I'm all that cut out for it. I seem to be much too curious a person, as I ended up just reading all the different "options" for the adventure and pretended I was reading alternate universe perspectives or something.
So if you are looking for a choose-your-own book, I think this would be one of the better ones. But I'm probably biased because of the vampire slayer part of it.
Although I semi-kinda-sorta-enjoyed it, I can't say that I would recommend going out of your way to read this as an adult reader. If it falls into your lap at the bookstore or you have "vampire slaying" addiction like me, then go ahead and give it a try for nostalgia's sake.
Because since when did turning Sleeping Beauty into a Vampire Slayer sound not-awesome?!
Vampires may get old, but vampire slaying is pretty much ALWAYS good! I sometimes wonder if anyone could change that...
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(I received this book as a free review copy from Netgalley. Thanks Netgalley and Silver Dolphin Books!)...more
WEEEEE I'M A PONY!! YAY I CAN FLY AND STAB PEOPLE WITH MY HORN! LET'S MAKE FRIENDS. YAAAY, FRIENDS! WAIT, NOOOOO, DON'T DO THAT. THAT HURTS, FRIENDS. WEEEEE I'M A PONY!! YAY I CAN FLY AND STAB PEOPLE WITH MY HORN! LET'S MAKE FRIENDS. YAAAY, FRIENDS! WAIT, NOOOOO, DON'T DO THAT. THAT HURTS, FRIENDS. DON'T KILL ME!! AHHHHHHHHHHH! I'M A PONY! WHO WANTS TO HURT A PONY?! NOOOOOOOOO!!
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Interested? I thought so.
This short story is exactly that - short. But EVER so insightful. It is remarkable how something so short can be so insightful. It will literally take you like 2 seconds to read, but you will not be able to stop thinking about it.
Kids who hurt ponies. That about sums it up. And thanks to Stephen for making me aware of it. Thank you! Everyone MUST read it.
Yes, it's disturbing. Another one of those books that is a spoonful of Meth disguised as a spoonful of sugar. It will take you to places you've never dreamed of and hopefully never will. And that is something that I always look for in a story.
But I think that we've established that kids can be jerks. However, if you are going to kill a pony or a unicorn - at least, put the meat to good use...
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Just kidding, kids!! Please don't kill your ponies and/or unicorns, if you are lucky enough to be in the presence of such awesomeness!
It has been a well known fact for quite some time that girls are mean. I never thought that they would go so far as to hurt a pony, but it seems that nothing is sacred to the little brats. Not in the pursuit of popularity, at least.
Now, we also know that a mean girl can even corrupt a PONY and turn then into murdering maniacs, just at the bat of an eyelash.
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I have certainly known girls like this in my life. Even so-called friends are ready to throw you to killer ponies if it means being accepted by someone else. It is all too unfortunate. Maybe if little girls were forced to read this story, they would think twice about being cruel. Somehow, I doubt it though.
All in all. It is an amazing allegory. And so so worth your time. Some will regret reading it, but I really believe that most will be able to fully appreciate it.
I will leave you with this simple thought: Please be kind to your Ponies and/or Unicorns. What have they ever done except for be made of awesome?!
Awesome and hugs, dreams, wishes, happiness, and so on and so forth:
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Oh! And superglue, apparently. Who knew?
If you need something to cheer you up afterward (and trust me, you will) - you can always just google "Custom My Little Pony". There are hundreds, maybe thousands!...more
The hottest novella from Carina Press today is Baaaaadlands. This book has everything: technology a la steampunk, airship battles, a strangely named hThe hottest novella from Carina Press today is Baaaaadlands. This book has everything: technology a la steampunk, airship battles, a strangely named heroine, and "hafnawawo".
What's "hafnawawo" - you ask?
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Well, the thing every good action flick needs (or at least, usually seems to have). Half naked warrior women!!
The badlands are a desolate land of crime and fighting. Criminals are sent north away from the populated areas. A tribe of warrior women patrol the borders, fighting off the criminals to keep them from crossing back over.
The queen of the tribe is murdered, Ever (our main character) is tasked with finding the princess to assume the queen's duties. Right at the start of her quest, she is injured and picked up by an airship.
Onboard the Dark Hawk, she manages to catch the eye of the men. It wasn't a difficult task considering she was half naked at the time she boarded, since the warrior women usually fight in various stages of undress.
Seriously though. What women, in their right mind, would want to fight battles half-naked, with their goods hanging out...
Well, there's Xena and Gabrielle:
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And of course, the girl contestants of survivor:
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But why actually fight naked when you could get the same effect with these Boob Scarves?
Anyway - an exciting airship battle ensues, with Ever manning the military turret. After taking down the enemy for them, she enlists the crew of the Dark Hawk to help on her mission.
I am absolutely fascinated by the way the author set the mood of the book. I saw everything so clearly in my mind. Our heroine, Ever (yes, I'll get to the name in a minute) and her comrades are the female version of Spartans. The bleak setting blends flawlessly into the background against the stark contrast of gore, creating a 300-esque vibe in the beginning.
I would love to see more of the world in Badlands. Most of this novella took place onboard the airship, instead of on the battle grounds of the women.
As pretty as the name Ever is, it can also cause confusion. It can easily be mistaken for the word "even" at the beginning of a sentence or as part of the sentence instead of as a name. It certainly took some getting used too.
The one big gripe that I have is over the perspective. Clarity on this subject isn't exactly the authors strong point. Because of the way that some sentences are phrased, it came across at times as "head-jumping" and I was left wondering who's perspective we were supposed to be getting.
Fav quote: He laughed, and the sound touched her in places far more intimate than her ears.
Decent romance, sexual tension, and love scenes. There is a love triangle. (No way!) Great battles. Not too shabby writing. The thing I liked is that it didn't feel like a "romance" novel right from the first word, as so many do.
Overall, this was a very good short novel. The steam technology wasn't all that present but it was obviously being used as a backdrop. Beautifully toned and shows great PROMISE, but I wouldn't call this great just yet.
A strong 3 1/2 out of 5 stars.
I'm very interested to see more from this author and even more in this world. A full length novel with more based in the tribe of women would be very intriguing.
Oh and I almost ignored another tribe of women who fight half naked!
Can't forget the girls of "Jersey Shore."
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(I received this as a review copy from Netgalley. Thanks Netgalley and Carina Press!)...more
Imagine - if you will - a fantastical world where artificial beings made out of inanimate objects have taken the place of humans...
[image] Cogworth andImagine - if you will - a fantastical world where artificial beings made out of inanimate objects have taken the place of humans...
In Like Clockwork, these beings called automatons, built with pistons and gears, look just like us and have begun filling most job positions, leaving living humans to fend for themselves in unemployment. Unfortunately, this idea isn't to far off base. It's all too familiar a theme for many people these days. Just replace the automatons with our own modern technology.
Victoria Waters, a young woman working toward a better and more balanced society between humans and automatons, is kidnapped. Her kidnappers intend to hold her for ransom in order to force action within the government. Their end-game is to have the automatons destroyed and jobs returned to the people. Honorable intentions? Yes. Ridiculous expectations? Certainly. Craaaaaaaazy? No doubt.
Right on the very first page, Dee sets up an deeply intense and violent scene of dissection and dismemberment. Immediately, I felt disturbingly interested in this unknown character. Referring to his night of dark deeds as "pleasant", he seems much to satisfied with himself for being such a twisted individual. Needless to say, the prologue drew in me in close. But we are abruptly torn away from this mystery.
I enjoyed learning the scantly few facts about the automaton based society. However, I did not care for Victoria or being inside her head.
Her kidnapper-slash-love interest isn't any better. He gets aroused immediately after abducting her. I think that could be toned down a bit. A hot stab of lust, really? Because you knocked out some chick and are now lugging her around over your shoulder - riiiiight. I'm really sympathizing with you on that one. Kidnapping gets me all worked up, too. It really makes me want to just go completely crazy, get all sweaty and you know.... PUNCH YOU IN THE JUNK!!
[image] Hey, bears have junk too, dude!
Apart from the prologue, the beginning especially was very lack luster and disconnected. Girl running to her meeting. Guy kidnapping her and getting turned on (and getting an imaginary punch in the junk from me). Guy running to hideout.
Meanwhile, I want to know what's with the guy dissecting people in the prologue?!?!
The book is mainly about the relationship which is entirely lackadaisical. It takes much too long to get into the mystery part and when it does - it's predictable and monotonous.
Another INSTA-FOREVER relationship. The so-called romance is dispassionate and banter between the two is cliched and too often blown out of proportion.
There just weren't enough pages in this novella for a true connection to develop. So once again, were stuck with token soul mates. It leaves me wondering if am I missing something.
Is there a machine for this?! Put in a quarter and out pops your soulmate doubloon?
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The clockwork world, in general, shows great promise but the characters took it down a notch. Well, more than just one notch. Maybe it was just really not my thing. It's difficult to get invested in something without more time and pages. And without passion.
Then there is an entire epilogue, as long as the chapters, solely for the purpose of another sex scene. Five months after they got together. After the plot is over! I kept expecting craziness to ensue, like a huge gear pops out of her chest or something as they both realize that she is an automaton. That would have been an ending I could go for. But alas no, it was just another languid love scene.
Although I was intrigued by the attempt at world-building, it was greatly lacking. It begs the question: Do some authors even research the actual technology of automatons and steam-powered devices?
With the recent influx of steampunk and clockwork books, most can leave a lot to be desired. There is such a rich and interesting history when it comes to such things. I feel like people just see this steam-powered engine huffing along and think "I don't know what it is or where its going - but look at all the people on there!! Let's go!" They write steampunk just for the sole purpose of joining the party, not because they are truly passionate about the technology.
However, the struggles of this clockwork world, trying to find a balance between automation and natural life, seems to parallel some of our own dilemmas in this age. With so much going digital, I constantly find myself asking "How far is too far?" Our female lead poses this argument from the start and plants a seed of suspicion in your mind. Be wary of technology, it says. If an automated device causes harm to a human, is it just a freak accident? Or is it subterfuge?
[image] Sorry, Master. I swear that I didn't mean to become the vacuum cleaner from Hell.
Overall, this novel was short but not sweet. In fact, it left a bland taste in my mouth. Maybe had the world been developed further and had it held the deeper atmosphere of mystery that the prologue did, things could have been different.
I've just started another book for review called Badlands and it is already much more intriguing. So I will be crossing my fingers for it throughout the rest of my reading time. Well, maybe not the entire rest of the time, because that would make things rather difficult.
Edit: You can now read my review for Badlands HERE
(I received this book as a free review copy from Netgalley. Thanks Netgalley and Carina Press!)...more
As if we need more reasons to punch dolphins in the mouth.
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A hilarious new coffee table book from a website called The Oatmeal.
Everything I As if we need more reasons to punch dolphins in the mouth.
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A hilarious new coffee table book from a website called The Oatmeal.
Everything I need to know about life, I learned from this book: (I swear to you, all this stuff is really in it.)
1) At the urinal: men groan, talk to each other about drywall and chainsaws, and then congratulate each other on a job well done. I guess the only witnesses are the clouds outside the window...
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2) All those little clicks and whistles that dolphins make may sound cute, but they are actually vulgar insults. Ergo - It's okay to PUNCH THEM.
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3) People you really don't know will invite you to their Cat's Birthday just because you are friends on Facebook.
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4) You can totally get arrested for giving out free hugs...
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5) Kittens should be prepared for war with samurai swords. All kitties are really ninjas deep inside.
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6) Knowing this just might save your life - neither of these is a pony:
None of the above are the exact quotes or actual images from 5 Very Good Reasons to Punch a Dolphin in the Mouth, but they are the morals of this book. If you want to see them (and believe me - you do), then you will have to get the book yourself. I didn't know about the Oatmeal website before I read this, but I will certainly be visiting it now.
This is a compilation of animated short comics from the Oatmeal website. It includes helpful and comprehensive guides to the most common issues of life, including lists of: different types of airline passengers, high fives and when to use them, types of handshakes, crappy pedestrians. Not to mention: a polar bear's guide to making friends, how to ride a pony, why you shouldn't feed your T-Rex cocaine and so much more.
The Facebook bit was my favorite. It is a list of all the different types of Facebook trolls, accompanied by illustrations of them and their shenanigans. Not that I would know first hand, since I'm not on Facebook, but the list confirmed most of my sneaking suspicions.
This is an igneous comic/picture comedy. I don't even know how to classify this book. Wait, yeah I do. Awesome sauce!! This book is awesome sauce!
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There are violent, crude, and awkward images. Sexual content and language - but it's all done so tastefully :) I mean, there's even a bit about why bacon is better than true love. Hahahahaha! Its a "bacon" bit!!! Yum...
Hilariously informative! The perfect coffee table book for non-prudes, Beavis and Butthead, stressed out people, Bill Murray, sarcastic people, Ben Stein, perky yet dark people, Buffy, apparently anyone whose name starts with a B, and basically anyone who can appreciate non-PG-rated humor.
If you have any sense but no sensibilities, or at least if your sensibilities are not easily offended - then read then book.
If your senses and sensibilities are sensitive - don't.
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(I received this as a free review copy from Netgalley. Thanks Netgalley!)...more
The first book, Poison Study, was awesome and gave you that happy-go-lucky feeling at the end and you want to yell "weeeeeee". The second book, Magic Study, was "eh". It felt somewhat disconnected from the original but still good. This third one, Fire Study, was just plain worn-out and over done, too much going on without much really happening. It had it's moments but mostly it was "blah".
So if we are going according to the chart, the next book in the Study series should involve zombies!! Let's face it - everything is better with zombies. But sadly, that epic has never been written and probably never will be. To sum up, the Study series in descending order: weeeeeee, eh, blah, zombies!!
In Fire Study, epic fantasy combines with action in the tale of Yelena, a young woman who has recently discovered her magical abilities and (shocker!) needs to use them to help save the world!
When you find a book with an insightful horse that communicates telepathically with it's rider and gives advice while still managing to avoid preaching and be nothing like Ishmael, then normally you would think that you had hit the jackpot!
Things I enjoyed about the book:
1) Kiki - Insightful and hilarious telepathic talking horse.
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B) A very batty spirit guide for your journey.
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3) Making nice with giant snakes!
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Things I didn't like:
A) The endless disguising and playing dress-up.
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351) All the rehashing and recycling of events.
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I found myself bothered by one of the character's story lines and much to my surprise, I was annoyed by his absence. Cahil had begun to grow on me and I don't like it when fluff characters or those who provide comic relief turn into the bad guy, if you can really even call him that. It just doesn't work for me unless they are absolutely diabolical or pull some kind of switcharoo. A good example that comes to mind is (Beware! Harry Potter spoiler - Are there still people who haven't read Harry Potter?)(view spoiler)[Mad Eye Moody (hide spoiler)]. Now that was a head spinner. Cahil just doesn't work as a villain. In fact, his character could easily have been explored to a much deeper level and used to make the story more interesting.
The villains didn't seem to have a face either. The entire book was just kinda of "Yelena against the man". Who's the man? You ask. That's the question, isnt it? The big bad "they". There was so much mistrust and flip flopping by the characters. Most of the book, it just wasn't clear who the ultimate evil was or who exactly it was we were fighting against.
Now, my answer to the question: Who's the man? JANCO. JANCO IS THE MAN! My man, at least. So where was he?? I absolutely hated the near disappearance of my two favorite characters, Ari and Janco. Now that is a spin-off I would love!!
I absolutely enjoy a good spinoff. I mean what would life have been without the TV show Angel? But near the beginning, I felt like the circumstances with Opal Cohen were contrived specifically with the intent to launch the spin-off series. These parts were very interesting; I just wish that we could have seen a greater effect overall on the story. Although, I really did enjoy the way Opal's ability came into play at the end.
Throughout a good portion of the book, Yelena's is accompanied by her storyweaver and official guru, Moon Man. He is funny, wise, and great - but only to an extent. His impact is lessened when he is around soooo much, especially near the beginning. Did Yoda follow Luke Skywalker around throughout the entire original trilogy? No, because he's too damn smart for that. Also, was Yoda constantly naked? No. Because he's too damn smart for that. Or - maybe it was just because he was out of his prime.
[image] When 900 years old I reach, look as good I will not.
Really though. Moon Man is always naked. Geez, Moon Man, what do you think this is - Frikkin Survivor? Should I call you Richard Hatch? Don't worry. No visual aid for that one. Your welcome!
My favorite quote from this book is a simple but adorable one by Leif: "What are you scheming, little sister?" And I was glad that the two of them were finally bonding.
Valek was hardly around at all in this one as well. But it didn't bother me anyway because his character had basically become mush. He used to be gruff and masculine, now he's all "blah blah, lovey dovey". I know - I have a way with words, don't I? He was not at all the Valek I loved in the first book. I miss him. And if I hear the words "My love" ONE MORE TIME...
The audio was very good although sometimes unintentionally funny. Sound quality was beautiful and professional. The narrator's voice was usually very smooth; I just got a kick out of the various voices. But I am "easily giggled."
Like I said before, I felt there was too much explaining of past events that wasn't necessary or relevant at the time. But overall, an enjoyable series. The best of which is the first book and I would definitely recommend you read Poison Study.
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