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Going to artsy college is weird.

The school reading I’m used to is, like, white dudes with sharp writing styles from the mid-twentieth century. Or white dudes with clunky writing styles from the nineteenth century. Or the occasional lyrical white dude from ancient Greece.

There’s some of that at artsy college. But there’s also this.

Yes. I read this book, about bloggers in a zombie apocalypse, for a real, human class. For credit. This book got me that one extra step toward graduation.

Does it seem like I lead a legitimate existence to you? Because I question it sometimes myself.

Unfortunately, I didn’t like blogger zombie book. It’s crazy long, for one thing. 599 pages!!!

Those six hundred minus one pages are mostly made up of the same descriptions over and over, which makes for a notoriously fun reading experience. Not that many zombies, but I definitely heard about the protagonist’s need for light-blocking sunglasses 599 times. (Once per page. Like clockwork.)

I have also never, in my whole life, read worldbuilding quite like this. This is what the entire book was:

Little bit of plot -> dialogue -> 10-15 pages of worldbuilding -> continuation of presumed-dead conversation -> little bit more plot -> 20 pages of worldbuilding -> Emma just punching herself in the face to feel alive.

This went on for 600 pages.

Minus one.

Just, like. The most unlikable characters of all time. Plot holes that looked like someone drove a semi truck through the climax. (Probably me! I would love to drive a tractor-trailer through this book please!!!) Not a lot of zombies but a whole lot of explanation of the pseudo-science that allowed curing the cold and cancer to create a zombie virus.

Fun!

Bottom line: The previous word is a LIE.