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The Wives: A Memoir
An Indie Next Pick!
“A haunting, beautifully written celebration of found sisterhood.” —Publishers Weekly, starred review
“A fearless, engaging, and important memoir.” —Library Journal, starred review
“[A] gorgeously rendered peek behind the curtain of military life.” —Booklist, starred review
A captivating memoir that tells the story of one woman’s experience of joining a community of army wives after leaving her New York City job—a profoundly intimate look at marriage, friendship, and the power of human connection.
When her new husband joins an elite Army unit, Simone Gorrindo is uprooted from New York City and dropped into Columbus, Georgia. With her husband frequently deployed, Simone is left to find her place in this new world, alone—until she meets the wives.
Gorrindo gives us an intimate look into the inner lives of a remarkable group of women and a tender, unflinching portrait of a marriage. A love story, an unforgettable coming-of-age tale, and a bracing tour of the intractable divisions that plague our country today, The Wives offers a rare and powerful gift: a hopeful stitch in the fabric of a torn America.
“A haunting, beautifully written celebration of found sisterhood.” —Publishers Weekly, starred review
“A fearless, engaging, and important memoir.” —Library Journal, starred review
“[A] gorgeously rendered peek behind the curtain of military life.” —Booklist, starred review
A captivating memoir that tells the story of one woman’s experience of joining a community of army wives after leaving her New York City job—a profoundly intimate look at marriage, friendship, and the power of human connection.
When her new husband joins an elite Army unit, Simone Gorrindo is uprooted from New York City and dropped into Columbus, Georgia. With her husband frequently deployed, Simone is left to find her place in this new world, alone—until she meets the wives.
Gorrindo gives us an intimate look into the inner lives of a remarkable group of women and a tender, unflinching portrait of a marriage. A love story, an unforgettable coming-of-age tale, and a bracing tour of the intractable divisions that plague our country today, The Wives offers a rare and powerful gift: a hopeful stitch in the fabric of a torn America.
416 pages, Hardcover
First published April 9, 2024
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 202 reviews
February 14, 2024
Release Date April 9, 2024
I thoroughly enjoyed this memoir.
The author was able to share her life as an army wife and helps to shed light on the trials and tribulations of the army life that spouses experience when their loved one is deployed.
Written in a way that non-military individuals can understand, it also allows a connection for those of us who do understand the life because we’ve lived it.
I found the genuine connections the author made with other wives to be heartwarming. The relationship aspect with her husband was also a highlight for me. Told in such a way that this feels part novel, part real life, I found myself highly interested from the start.
Would highly recomend if you are looking for a memoir that gives you all the feels, pulls your heartstrings and gives you a glimpse at military life.
I thoroughly enjoyed this memoir.
The author was able to share her life as an army wife and helps to shed light on the trials and tribulations of the army life that spouses experience when their loved one is deployed.
Written in a way that non-military individuals can understand, it also allows a connection for those of us who do understand the life because we’ve lived it.
I found the genuine connections the author made with other wives to be heartwarming. The relationship aspect with her husband was also a highlight for me. Told in such a way that this feels part novel, part real life, I found myself highly interested from the start.
Would highly recomend if you are looking for a memoir that gives you all the feels, pulls your heartstrings and gives you a glimpse at military life.
April 15, 2024
DNF @53%
*author should not have been the audio narrator. She was monotone and very gratting to listen to.
As a United States Air Force veteran spouse, the tone and rhetoric was very anti American and a huge waste of my time. I could not believe her ignorance and judgement of the Army and their spouses.
*author should not have been the audio narrator. She was monotone and very gratting to listen to.
As a United States Air Force veteran spouse, the tone and rhetoric was very anti American and a huge waste of my time. I could not believe her ignorance and judgement of the Army and their spouses.
February 10, 2024
I was excited to read this book as I have been a military spouse for 18.5 years and was a military brat. My husband was former Army who wanted to go to Ranger school but ended up swapping to AF. I wanted to learn what the life was like. It was not at all what I expected. It wasn’t a look into what the lives are like as much as a long list of complaints about her issues with the military, the wives, and America.
Unfortunately the author comes off extremely anti-American (to the point she makes the comment about the flag bothering her) and her liberal ideology is woven throughout the book.
The book starts off with some background info into her life. She grew up in California and ends up moving to New York. Her and her husband had known each other from California and he tells her he’d pick the Army over her. They go to couple therapy where she decides she does love him enough to follow him. They have a court wedding and move to GA where she is immediately thrown into Army life and he is deployed.
She talks about how Rachel her neighbor and her become immediate friends. This is typical military spouse life. You move and you find friends immediately who become closer than family in many cases because they’re the ones there for you during the rough times when the spouses are gone. I felt like she did a good job with explaining what it is like to be thrown into the military lifestyle especially as an outsider; unfortunately, that’s about where the good ends.
What bothered me so much though was she begins to air the wives secrets. Clearly she doesn’t know the unwritten spouse rules because I’d never be okay with someone airing things I’d told them about marital problems, squadron issues, just life. I’m hoping she got permission to share for example how one of the men in the unit was verbally abusive after drinking too much. Or how another wife wrote papers for her husband for college (I’m waiting for him to get into trouble for plagiarism and his career to be over) because the military has decided that in addition to their insane training schedule and deployment rotation they need to get a college degree. These were just a few of the examples of airing others dirty laundry.
My other issue was how she sees enlisted wives. She says at one point speaking about officers’ wives, “I had more in common with them than Officer wives. An obvious shared cultural experience was college…. We’d grown up, most of us, in leafy suburbs and midsized cities with bookstores and a decent collection of restaurants, not rural, 3,000 person towns…” First off, I’m an officer wife whose dad was enlisted. My parents were not college educated but we did live in large towns. Once my dad got out we spent the majority of my childhood between Seattle and California. My parents had grown up in the Seattle area. She again makes a comment, “Sometimes, I wondered if the officer wives looked at me the same way. The wife of an enlisted man? Must be an interim gig. Way too smart.” This is so pretentious. She acts like the average enlisted wife is a dumb bimbo who is barefoot and pregnant all of the time. I feel bad for the enlisted wives who read this. I know women who went to college and refuse to read a book. And I know people who never went to college who are smarter than college educated people. Another direct quote of hers, “every officer wife I’d met so far seemed well-bred in a way those kids from my high school had, like they’d probably grown up with dance lessons and summer camps and sweet notes in their lunch boxes.” Again, as an officer wife, I didn’t grow up with any of that. She has an extremely jaded view of the enlisted wives and these are just a few examples.
If she’s not complaining about the wives and their lack of education she’s complaining about the deployments. Yes, they’re hard. Yes they suck. She’s active duty and those wives are amazing about jumping in to help out. She does talk about how Rachel helped her as she massively struggled with anxiety and as someone who myself struggles with anxiety I could relate to her on this one issue. But I could not imagine literally moving in with someone else for months on end (what seemed to be the case) because of anxiety.
The one positive she talks about is mental health care. Her and her husband actually go to see a counselor which is huge especially in the SF community where they believe in taking care of things on their own.
If the book hadn’t had such a jaded view I still couldn’t give it a high rating. It jumped around quite often and felt very flat. Often, the only time she went into deep descriptions on people or places was when they were bad. I loved the show and book series “Army Wives” even if it wasn’t accurate because of how engaging it was. I thought this would be fun to read but instead she shoved her politics and anti religious views down my throat. At the end she even speaks to her husband’s disdain towards President Trump. While we have a president that we are completely opposed to now and weren’t huge Trump fans, I cannot imagine my husband or myself airing our blatant disrespect towards them. The president is their boss at the end of the day.
I asked other military spouses about some of these quotes and we all agreed they were out of line. Many said they would absolutely not pay to read this book.
I saved a ton of quotes please feel free to read through them.
Thanks to NetGalley for this preread.
Unfortunately the author comes off extremely anti-American (to the point she makes the comment about the flag bothering her) and her liberal ideology is woven throughout the book.
The book starts off with some background info into her life. She grew up in California and ends up moving to New York. Her and her husband had known each other from California and he tells her he’d pick the Army over her. They go to couple therapy where she decides she does love him enough to follow him. They have a court wedding and move to GA where she is immediately thrown into Army life and he is deployed.
She talks about how Rachel her neighbor and her become immediate friends. This is typical military spouse life. You move and you find friends immediately who become closer than family in many cases because they’re the ones there for you during the rough times when the spouses are gone. I felt like she did a good job with explaining what it is like to be thrown into the military lifestyle especially as an outsider; unfortunately, that’s about where the good ends.
What bothered me so much though was she begins to air the wives secrets. Clearly she doesn’t know the unwritten spouse rules because I’d never be okay with someone airing things I’d told them about marital problems, squadron issues, just life. I’m hoping she got permission to share for example how one of the men in the unit was verbally abusive after drinking too much. Or how another wife wrote papers for her husband for college (I’m waiting for him to get into trouble for plagiarism and his career to be over) because the military has decided that in addition to their insane training schedule and deployment rotation they need to get a college degree. These were just a few of the examples of airing others dirty laundry.
My other issue was how she sees enlisted wives. She says at one point speaking about officers’ wives, “I had more in common with them than Officer wives. An obvious shared cultural experience was college…. We’d grown up, most of us, in leafy suburbs and midsized cities with bookstores and a decent collection of restaurants, not rural, 3,000 person towns…” First off, I’m an officer wife whose dad was enlisted. My parents were not college educated but we did live in large towns. Once my dad got out we spent the majority of my childhood between Seattle and California. My parents had grown up in the Seattle area. She again makes a comment, “Sometimes, I wondered if the officer wives looked at me the same way. The wife of an enlisted man? Must be an interim gig. Way too smart.” This is so pretentious. She acts like the average enlisted wife is a dumb bimbo who is barefoot and pregnant all of the time. I feel bad for the enlisted wives who read this. I know women who went to college and refuse to read a book. And I know people who never went to college who are smarter than college educated people. Another direct quote of hers, “every officer wife I’d met so far seemed well-bred in a way those kids from my high school had, like they’d probably grown up with dance lessons and summer camps and sweet notes in their lunch boxes.” Again, as an officer wife, I didn’t grow up with any of that. She has an extremely jaded view of the enlisted wives and these are just a few examples.
If she’s not complaining about the wives and their lack of education she’s complaining about the deployments. Yes, they’re hard. Yes they suck. She’s active duty and those wives are amazing about jumping in to help out. She does talk about how Rachel helped her as she massively struggled with anxiety and as someone who myself struggles with anxiety I could relate to her on this one issue. But I could not imagine literally moving in with someone else for months on end (what seemed to be the case) because of anxiety.
The one positive she talks about is mental health care. Her and her husband actually go to see a counselor which is huge especially in the SF community where they believe in taking care of things on their own.
If the book hadn’t had such a jaded view I still couldn’t give it a high rating. It jumped around quite often and felt very flat. Often, the only time she went into deep descriptions on people or places was when they were bad. I loved the show and book series “Army Wives” even if it wasn’t accurate because of how engaging it was. I thought this would be fun to read but instead she shoved her politics and anti religious views down my throat. At the end she even speaks to her husband’s disdain towards President Trump. While we have a president that we are completely opposed to now and weren’t huge Trump fans, I cannot imagine my husband or myself airing our blatant disrespect towards them. The president is their boss at the end of the day.
I asked other military spouses about some of these quotes and we all agreed they were out of line. Many said they would absolutely not pay to read this book.
I saved a ton of quotes please feel free to read through them.
Thanks to NetGalley for this preread.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 7, 2024
I wasn’t sure what to expect when I picked this one up. I will admit if I hadn’t received a copy from Goodreads and it hadn’t been a bookish first book I may have passed on it. I have little interest in the military or that style of life. I think I enjoyed this book more because I could see myself sliding into that life like Simone did, against her will and full of doubts. I found myself agreeing with Simone’s assessment of the people she came across which helped me to better relate to her since I don’t know that I could give up my home and career and life to be “a wife”. Her writing was excellent and I am in awe at the level of honesty she shared with the readers. While this may be her first book I do not think it will be her last and while she tends to drift more towards essay and non-fiction I hope she ventures into fiction at some point. I think she has plenty of creativity. This book shows the beginning of Simone’s husband Andrew’s career with the military and what Simone sacrificed and found in becoming an army wife.
August 5, 2023
Thank you to NetGalley for this advance reader copy. Military life is a kind of a elite, but segregated world.. if you’re not military, you really don’t fit in but if you are military and you can mesh with others, it makes your life a lot easier. Simone discusses her life throughout the years and these facts are helpful for other is going through a similar situation. I live near a large base, and I see the women bonding with one another.. I appreciate all aspects of this book, and I learned a lot about military life. These women are courageous , possibly even more determined than their husbands who are out there battling for our country. The women are the ones that support these strong men, and this book tells you all about those struggles.
October 31, 2023
I wasn’t sure what to expect when I picked this one up. I can’t identify with the experiences of a military wife. Still, I am a military mom of two, so I feel I have some knowledge of the sacrifices faced by military families. The lack of communication and the general anxiety felt when the world gets dangerous –are things familiar to me. This was an intriguing look at the life of a military wife, with all the difficulties and stress associated with having a spouse on deployment. I did feel, however, a pervasive sense of condescension throughout the book – as if the author only barely tolerated these other wives, especially those of enlisted men. It left me with a little bit of an uncomfortable feeling. The book highlighted the stresses of having a spouse in the military, especially one deployed for long periods. It made me grateful for those who serve faithfully next to their military spouses. Thanks to NetGalley, the publisher and author, for an advanced copy. All opinions are my own.
April 17, 2024
Do y’all remember the tv show Army Wives? They all lived on base and were up in each other’s lives like burrs on a long haired Australian Shepherd. Inseparable.
Okay, this is not really that or the author didn’t get her point fully across. I don’t know which.
I think maybe this author is a giant introvert IRL. The first half was basically internal chatter. I thought it would have been better titled The Wife.
The 2nd half covered a long deployment and her pregnancy and we start to see Simone’s vulnerable side and her need for The Wives. This was the stronger half of the story.
All this to say, I really rather liked this book and Simone’s story. But I did not leave feeling a sense of unity amongst the wives or get to hear nearly enough about their friendships. Maybe just a case of reading something I didn’t expect, not getting what I came for but rather liking it nonetheless.
Okay, this is not really that or the author didn’t get her point fully across. I don’t know which.
I think maybe this author is a giant introvert IRL. The first half was basically internal chatter. I thought it would have been better titled The Wife.
The 2nd half covered a long deployment and her pregnancy and we start to see Simone’s vulnerable side and her need for The Wives. This was the stronger half of the story.
All this to say, I really rather liked this book and Simone’s story. But I did not leave feeling a sense of unity amongst the wives or get to hear nearly enough about their friendships. Maybe just a case of reading something I didn’t expect, not getting what I came for but rather liking it nonetheless.
July 11, 2023
The memoir "The Wives" by Simone Gorrindo offers a powerful and intimate exploration of marriage, friendship, and community within a tightknit group of army wives. Gorrindo shares her personal journey of leaving her job in New York City to follow her enlisted husband to Columbus, Georgia, a place that feels completely unfamiliar to her.
As her husband is frequently deployed, Simone is left to navigate this new world alone. However, her life takes a significant turn when she meets the other army wives. Through her storytelling, Gorrindo provides readers with a profound glimpse into the inner lives of these women, highlighting their strength, resilience, and unique experiences. The bonds they form become an essential source of support and companionship in their shared challenges.
"The Wives" is not just a memoir about military life; it's a love story and a coming-of-age tale. Gorrindo beautifully portrays the evolution of her own marriage, capturing the complexities and sacrifices that are inherent in such relationships. The memoir also serves as a poignant reflection on the divisions that exist within America today. Gorrindo explores these divisions with honesty and courage, offering a thought-provoking perspective on the current state of the country.
What sets "The Wives" apart is the author's ability to weave together various themes and emotions into a cohesive narrative. Gorrindo's writing is both tender and unflinching, painting a vivid picture of her experiences and emotions. Her storytelling is compelling, drawing readers into her world and allowing them to empathize with her joys, sorrows, and everything in between.
Ultimately, "The Wives" is a rare and powerful memoir that offers a glimpse into a community often overlooked or misunderstood. It is a gift that provides hope and resilience, reminding us of the strength that can be found in human connection even in the face of adversity. Simone Gorrindo's memoir is a remarkable achievement that will resonate with readers long after they turn the final page.
As her husband is frequently deployed, Simone is left to navigate this new world alone. However, her life takes a significant turn when she meets the other army wives. Through her storytelling, Gorrindo provides readers with a profound glimpse into the inner lives of these women, highlighting their strength, resilience, and unique experiences. The bonds they form become an essential source of support and companionship in their shared challenges.
"The Wives" is not just a memoir about military life; it's a love story and a coming-of-age tale. Gorrindo beautifully portrays the evolution of her own marriage, capturing the complexities and sacrifices that are inherent in such relationships. The memoir also serves as a poignant reflection on the divisions that exist within America today. Gorrindo explores these divisions with honesty and courage, offering a thought-provoking perspective on the current state of the country.
What sets "The Wives" apart is the author's ability to weave together various themes and emotions into a cohesive narrative. Gorrindo's writing is both tender and unflinching, painting a vivid picture of her experiences and emotions. Her storytelling is compelling, drawing readers into her world and allowing them to empathize with her joys, sorrows, and everything in between.
Ultimately, "The Wives" is a rare and powerful memoir that offers a glimpse into a community often overlooked or misunderstood. It is a gift that provides hope and resilience, reminding us of the strength that can be found in human connection even in the face of adversity. Simone Gorrindo's memoir is a remarkable achievement that will resonate with readers long after they turn the final page.
November 26, 2023
This book The Military Wives is a powerful memoir about the wives of the men in the Army. Not knowing any military wives but one whose husband is in the coast guard, I know very little but this book is believable and I can only imagine how hard this life is! I think this author did a great job honoring the spouses in the military. Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for this early release in exchange for my honest review. To be published April 2024.
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April 1, 2024Why I Love It
By Fiora Elbers-Tibbitts
I usually prefer to read memoirs by people whose lives are completely different from mine. But at the onset of The Wives, our protagonist Simone Gorrindo’s world bears a lot of similarities to my own: she’s a woman in her late 20s based in New York City who works in book publishing, content with her shoebox apartment. That is, until her world is turned entirely upside down when her husband tells her he’s enlisted in the Army. And that’s where our paths diverge…
The Wives is the story of Gorrindo’s adjustment to life in rural Columbus, Georgia, where her husband is based and where, for months at a time, she has no one but the other Army wives to lean on. She goes to a book club, thrifts cheap furniture to fill her suddenly spacious house, scopes out a local coffee shop that reminds her of home, and struggles to find a renewed sense of purpose in a life so strictly dictated by her husband’s deployment schedule. All the while, she has no way of knowing if he’s safe.
Gorrindo writes with striking emotional honesty. Her loneliness is complicated, as is her relationship with her husband; she undoubtedly loves him, but can’t help but feel her own light has been dimmed for his higher calling. She worries about losing him. She worries about losing herself. The context here is specific, but the underlying question is universal: how much do we give of ourselves to the people we love?
By Fiora Elbers-Tibbitts
I usually prefer to read memoirs by people whose lives are completely different from mine. But at the onset of The Wives, our protagonist Simone Gorrindo’s world bears a lot of similarities to my own: she’s a woman in her late 20s based in New York City who works in book publishing, content with her shoebox apartment. That is, until her world is turned entirely upside down when her husband tells her he’s enlisted in the Army. And that’s where our paths diverge…
The Wives is the story of Gorrindo’s adjustment to life in rural Columbus, Georgia, where her husband is based and where, for months at a time, she has no one but the other Army wives to lean on. She goes to a book club, thrifts cheap furniture to fill her suddenly spacious house, scopes out a local coffee shop that reminds her of home, and struggles to find a renewed sense of purpose in a life so strictly dictated by her husband’s deployment schedule. All the while, she has no way of knowing if he’s safe.
Gorrindo writes with striking emotional honesty. Her loneliness is complicated, as is her relationship with her husband; she undoubtedly loves him, but can’t help but feel her own light has been dimmed for his higher calling. She worries about losing him. She worries about losing herself. The context here is specific, but the underlying question is universal: how much do we give of ourselves to the people we love?
April 1, 2024
A book that reminds us that there are sacrifices made at home too while our brave military fights Strong convictions and a good story to tell. For fans of Maid
November 27, 2023
*I received an ARC from NetGalley and Gallery/Scout press for my honest review*
I enjoyed this book for many reasons. The main one being that Simone is an incredible author. Her writing is smart and beautiful and witty and fluent.
However, my rating is stuck at three stars because I found her prose of a military wife to be … illogical. That might not be fair to her and I won’t pretend that her book allowed me a front row seat to her marriage in its entirety but I didn’t understand half of the things she was so upset about throughout the book.
I enjoyed this book for many reasons. The main one being that Simone is an incredible author. Her writing is smart and beautiful and witty and fluent.
However, my rating is stuck at three stars because I found her prose of a military wife to be … illogical. That might not be fair to her and I won’t pretend that her book allowed me a front row seat to her marriage in its entirety but I didn’t understand half of the things she was so upset about throughout the book.
April 16, 2024
Well, I tried really hard to like the main character in this memoir, but wow, what a condescending, woke, judgmental character she has shown herself to be. To me, she came off as racist, but in just a different way. I know this is her story to tell, but I got so tired of her pre-judging everyone, sometimes before they even speak! A southern accent does not automatically mean that they are dumb & uneducated! It means you are stationed in the south, Georgia to be specific. As someone from Chicago who married a college educated businessman from Georgia, I found her disdainfulness towards the south, conservatives, religious people, and the ARMY to be pretty much bigoted! She seemed to put everyone on a level beneath her, education wise, socially & politically - until she needed something from them! The wife of an army Ranger can’t be easy for anyone, but this gal who just seems to look for reasons to be offended, is certainly in the right place to get all up in a lather. Why she ever married this guy is beyond me. She is extra sensitive & married to her complete opposite. They knock heads on most subjects. Her lack of patriotism (especially for a military wife) was astounding to me when she was shocked & dismayed that her military husband wanted to display an American flag or practice his shooting at a gun range. Your husband is fighting for that flag. Are you actually pulling for the other side? His practice at a gun range just might save his or someone else’s life. I almost DNF this book, but I’m glad I persevered. Simone, the main character & author, did slowly & painfully grow quite a bit. She actually became slightly more tolerant, but not entirely & how excruciatingly hard it was for her to do so. However, even at the very end, she still chooses to judge people based on their political beliefs, as it’s extremely important for her to know how people voted.
If I could say one thing to her, it would be this: “Be teachable, you’re not always right.”
If I could say one thing to her, it would be this: “Be teachable, you’re not always right.”
April 7, 2024
Simone grew up in a dysfunctional family and didn’t want anything like that when she married Andrew. Andrew enlists in the army and life can be hard. Money is tight, so Simone, who is a journalist works some during their marriage. She makes good friends with some of the other army wives. She talks about her day-to-day life and wanting to eventually have children.
The military life is not for everyone. I found from reading the story that it’s a hard life for all involved. Yes the husbands go off to war but the wives have to deal with everything else and be a rock for their husbands. I can see how therapy would be helpful for these families.
It’s interesting (in a sad way) how Andrew changes during his time in the army. From his language to some of his beliefs. It seems like that’s true of all the wives his husbands.
I really wasn’t sure how well I would enjoy the story because I prefer fiction, but it’s very well written. The story is so fascinating. I didn’t realize how hard it is on the family of a soldier. Never knowing whether your spouse is OK and not having any information of their whereabouts. I recommend this story, it was very good!
The military life is not for everyone. I found from reading the story that it’s a hard life for all involved. Yes the husbands go off to war but the wives have to deal with everything else and be a rock for their husbands. I can see how therapy would be helpful for these families.
It’s interesting (in a sad way) how Andrew changes during his time in the army. From his language to some of his beliefs. It seems like that’s true of all the wives his husbands.
I really wasn’t sure how well I would enjoy the story because I prefer fiction, but it’s very well written. The story is so fascinating. I didn’t realize how hard it is on the family of a soldier. Never knowing whether your spouse is OK and not having any information of their whereabouts. I recommend this story, it was very good!
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April 16, 2024I decided this year not to give star ratings to memoirs - it just feels weird when memoirs are so personal. But here’s what I liked and didn’t like about this one.
What I liked: Gorrindo’s writing is the perfect blend of descriptive yet not too flowery. She does a great job painting a picture of life as an Army wife in Georgia, including her inner turmoil, thoughts, and joyful moments. The relationships between the women in this book were complex but beautiful.
What I didn’t like: 400 pages long, this felt a bit overkill at times. Some chapters were just…life. Which I totally understand, as life during a deployment is a slog. But I definitely felt like this could have been cut down by 50 pages and still had the same impact.
Overall, this is one woman’s perspective of being a military spouse. It gives a glimpse into the language and world of the Army, but I also don’t think it represents how all military families operate or feel. All in all, it was interesting and heartfelt & I’m glad I read it.
What I liked: Gorrindo’s writing is the perfect blend of descriptive yet not too flowery. She does a great job painting a picture of life as an Army wife in Georgia, including her inner turmoil, thoughts, and joyful moments. The relationships between the women in this book were complex but beautiful.
What I didn’t like: 400 pages long, this felt a bit overkill at times. Some chapters were just…life. Which I totally understand, as life during a deployment is a slog. But I definitely felt like this could have been cut down by 50 pages and still had the same impact.
Overall, this is one woman’s perspective of being a military spouse. It gives a glimpse into the language and world of the Army, but I also don’t think it represents how all military families operate or feel. All in all, it was interesting and heartfelt & I’m glad I read it.
March 10, 2024
The Wives: A Memoir
By: Simone Gorrindo
4🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
I could really relate to this memoir. I was an army brat and army wife and some of the things Simone went through were relatable.
🇺🇸
Simone and Andrew meet and he wants to join the military. She is used to NYC and when they go to Georgia, they both have no idea what to expect. He gets deployed quickly and she bonds with one of the wives.
🇺🇸
The wives you meet become family. The military life is one that is not easy, but you realize you are not alone.
🇺🇸
On a personal note:
I remember forming an FRG ( Family Readiness Group) meeting which helps families with meals, learning how to manage without their husbands and other personal stuff. During Desert Storm I realized how many spouses struggled with bills, children and dealing with deployments and loss. I was used to moving every 2-3 years and have been all over the world. I loved the military life and thankful I had strong parents and have friends from all over.
Thank you Galley/Scout Press for this advanced copy. This memoir is out April 9.
Triggers: 9/11, war, depression, drug dependency
#thewives, #simonegorrindo, #galley, #scoutpress, #bookreview, #booksconnectus, #stamperlady50, #bookstagram
By: Simone Gorrindo
4🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
I could really relate to this memoir. I was an army brat and army wife and some of the things Simone went through were relatable.
🇺🇸
Simone and Andrew meet and he wants to join the military. She is used to NYC and when they go to Georgia, they both have no idea what to expect. He gets deployed quickly and she bonds with one of the wives.
🇺🇸
The wives you meet become family. The military life is one that is not easy, but you realize you are not alone.
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On a personal note:
I remember forming an FRG ( Family Readiness Group) meeting which helps families with meals, learning how to manage without their husbands and other personal stuff. During Desert Storm I realized how many spouses struggled with bills, children and dealing with deployments and loss. I was used to moving every 2-3 years and have been all over the world. I loved the military life and thankful I had strong parents and have friends from all over.
Thank you Galley/Scout Press for this advanced copy. This memoir is out April 9.
Triggers: 9/11, war, depression, drug dependency
#thewives, #simonegorrindo, #galley, #scoutpress, #bookreview, #booksconnectus, #stamperlady50, #bookstagram
March 19, 2024
Simone’s peek into the life of a military wife, is something most of us never experience. The unknown, the fear, the feeling of being alone in a strange place with only strangers to rely on for companionship and comfort. She is giving us a look at the military from a wives point of view. I’ve loved this first look into her experience and the cover itself is beautiful and poignant.
This was a Bookishfirst sneak peek review.
This was a Bookishfirst sneak peek review.
April 17, 2024
This memoir was a fascinating glimpse behind the curtain of the reality of being a military spouse. I was drawn into Simone's experience from the first page, and was completely captivated by her story of life in a military community. I never knew how much I wanted to know about this unique lifestyle until reading this memoir! I especially appreciated Simone's honesty about her personal beliefs, and how that made her feel at times like an outsider. At its heart, Simone's story is about women supporting each other during challenging times, and the lifelong friendships made. I really loved this memoir.
March 9, 2024
This memoir takes the reader into the lives of military wives and their families.
The loneliness, the lack of information,the constant fear, and the uncertainty of what their husbands will be like when they return from deployment is overwhelming.
Gorrindo survives these ordeals with the help of the other wives, but it amazes me that so many marriages lasted.
The loneliness, the lack of information,the constant fear, and the uncertainty of what their husbands will be like when they return from deployment is overwhelming.
Gorrindo survives these ordeals with the help of the other wives, but it amazes me that so many marriages lasted.
March 26, 2024
Simone’s whining gets tedious after a while.
October 12, 2023
I received an advanced copy of The Wives from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
I was really interested to read this book considering I've had relatives in the military, but never someone as closely connected as a spouse. This was a fascinating look into the life of a woman who never wanted to be a military spouse and how her husband's choice to join the military impacted her and their relationship. While the various military wives that Simone meets and befriends play a major role in the book, I do feel like the later chunk of the book was more about her relationship with her husband and how they worked through their marital disagreements. While I wish the wives had played an even bigger role, I still found myself enjoying the book overall.
I was really interested to read this book considering I've had relatives in the military, but never someone as closely connected as a spouse. This was a fascinating look into the life of a woman who never wanted to be a military spouse and how her husband's choice to join the military impacted her and their relationship. While the various military wives that Simone meets and befriends play a major role in the book, I do feel like the later chunk of the book was more about her relationship with her husband and how they worked through their marital disagreements. While I wish the wives had played an even bigger role, I still found myself enjoying the book overall.
July 31, 2023
The Wives is SImone's story of her early married life and the life of an Army wife. The story has many flashbacks that explain how both Simone and her husband got to the present.
Simone's husband was a part of an elite group in the Army. and early in their marriage Simone is left alone in Georgia with other Army wives.
It is somewhat a coming of age story of accepting where and who you are. It was very obvious that Simone was not a fan of living in Georgia. As a Georgia resident, the negative tone against the south and conservatives in general was very obvious...however, it was her story.
Military spouses are certainly a group that deserve more recognition...they are at times being both parents and taking care of everything at home.
Thank you to NetGalley for this ARC.
Simone's husband was a part of an elite group in the Army. and early in their marriage Simone is left alone in Georgia with other Army wives.
It is somewhat a coming of age story of accepting where and who you are. It was very obvious that Simone was not a fan of living in Georgia. As a Georgia resident, the negative tone against the south and conservatives in general was very obvious...however, it was her story.
Military spouses are certainly a group that deserve more recognition...they are at times being both parents and taking care of everything at home.
Thank you to NetGalley for this ARC.
Read
August 29, 2023The Wives was an open memoir and an inside look at the life of an unlikely military wife and the military families whose spouses serve in the US Army. There were interesting parts of the book about the author’s background that made me sympathetic to her but that sympathy couldn’t carry me to get past her incredibly condescending attitude towards the other army wives. The entire time I was reading this book, I found myself cringing at the way she looked down at these women who were her supporters and community. She obviously felt superior to the women around her and her disdain for them made this a difficult read.
Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review this book.
Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review this book.
February 10, 2024
I loved this book so much! Gorrindo perfectly captured what I experienced as the wife of an enlisted Special Operations soldier who deployed many times. The highs and lows, the characters who make the military community unpredictable and rich…I wish everyone would read this memoir so they would understand a bit more about this community I love so much and see what military spouses go through on the homefront and how we rely so intensely on each other. Gorrindo’s writing is gorgeous and the pace of the book moves fast, but without rushing through key moments and experiences. This is truly a must-read. I’d give it six stars if I could.
April 14, 2024
IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR A BOOK THAT SHOWS WHAT IT’S LIKE TO BE A MILITARY SPOUSE? This is NOT the book for you.
I gave this book TWO stars because I had hope. Otherwise, it should’ve been a DNF after the first few chapters.
I want to be fair in my review because it was sold to potential readers as someone else’s experience as a military spouse - but this book wasn’t about her experience. It was more about Simone’s stance on all things political and honestly? A lot of looking down her nose at other people from start to finish.
I think my first cue that I should’ve put this book down was when I felt like I was constantly being preached to about history or what was going on in the world and (her opinion on) why it was happening. Or maybe it was the part where Simone came off as extremely anti American when she saw service members’ houses with an American flag flying in the front. Or it could’ve been the part where she and her husband drove through “enlisted housing” and saw women sitting on their front steps smoking a cigarette and being grateful they’d chosen to live in a rental rather than military housing.
But I slogged through it because I kept telling myself that surely it would get better. Spoiler alert: it didn’t.
I see a lot of reviews looking down at Simone’s political views but that’s not the person I am. Mainly because (we’ve heard this so many times, I know) I just don’t do politics - even at 40 years old - but man, having picked up a book to read about someone’s experience as a military spouse and instead hearing about their political beliefs every other page of this book was HARD.
I want to keep writing a review but can’t. Otherwise I’d just be handing out spoilers. But here’s the biggest spoiler you can grab from me at this time: it’s not worth your time. Or money.
Short version:
This book isn’t about her experience as a military spouse. This book is about Simone’s political and moral stances. Every now and then she mentions other spouses, but that’s only about 15% of the book. The other 85% is her droning on and being judgmental.
I gave this book TWO stars because I had hope. Otherwise, it should’ve been a DNF after the first few chapters.
I want to be fair in my review because it was sold to potential readers as someone else’s experience as a military spouse - but this book wasn’t about her experience. It was more about Simone’s stance on all things political and honestly? A lot of looking down her nose at other people from start to finish.
I think my first cue that I should’ve put this book down was when I felt like I was constantly being preached to about history or what was going on in the world and (her opinion on) why it was happening. Or maybe it was the part where Simone came off as extremely anti American when she saw service members’ houses with an American flag flying in the front. Or it could’ve been the part where she and her husband drove through “enlisted housing” and saw women sitting on their front steps smoking a cigarette and being grateful they’d chosen to live in a rental rather than military housing.
But I slogged through it because I kept telling myself that surely it would get better. Spoiler alert: it didn’t.
I see a lot of reviews looking down at Simone’s political views but that’s not the person I am. Mainly because (we’ve heard this so many times, I know) I just don’t do politics - even at 40 years old - but man, having picked up a book to read about someone’s experience as a military spouse and instead hearing about their political beliefs every other page of this book was HARD.
I want to keep writing a review but can’t. Otherwise I’d just be handing out spoilers. But here’s the biggest spoiler you can grab from me at this time: it’s not worth your time. Or money.
Short version:
This book isn’t about her experience as a military spouse. This book is about Simone’s political and moral stances. Every now and then she mentions other spouses, but that’s only about 15% of the book. The other 85% is her droning on and being judgmental.
April 9, 2024
Rating someone’s life story is hard, so I’m rating this based on clarity and organization. I found the author’s reflection to be compelling in a number of places, especially as someone who shares some overlapping experiences. The questions she asks about loving someone whose values and actions are or have been at odds with your beliefs are worth considering.
I’m not entirely sure who this book is for. It’s outside my usual reading scope, but I like trying new things, and the first chapter made it clear that I have some things in common with the author. But I’m not sure who I would recommend it to, as a large focus of the book is dedicated to the question of the author’s ethos and morality, and gradually bending it for the sake of…? Love, perhaps, or comfort. There’s something polished and glossy about the prose, even when she’s getting into the messier bits of her experience, that made me feel like I was being held at arm’s length. At the same time, there’d a lot of stuff that would be mentioned and then set aside. For example, she was in a terrible accident with serious physical repercussions, but then it’s never mentioned it again. A couple chapters end on cliffhangers of a sort that don’t really fit the tone.
The structure just felt a little wonky to me, and it threw the pacing off. I found her narrative engaging while I was reading it, but I’m not sure what to take away with me. This is a problem I often have with memoirs, where I get the sense that the author included everything that felt significant to them without thinking about their story as a narrative structure. I’m sure it’s hard to try to boil your life down to a thesis statement, but the pat ending in particular left me scratching my head.
Still, learning about other people’s lives is interesting. Gorrindo’s prose is solid and her characterizations are compelling. She talks a lot about physical and mental health in a way that I think will be validating for a lot of people in comparable situations.
Thank you to the publisher for sending me an ARC copy. My lukewarm feelings are my own.
I’m not entirely sure who this book is for. It’s outside my usual reading scope, but I like trying new things, and the first chapter made it clear that I have some things in common with the author. But I’m not sure who I would recommend it to, as a large focus of the book is dedicated to the question of the author’s ethos and morality, and gradually bending it for the sake of…? Love, perhaps, or comfort. There’s something polished and glossy about the prose, even when she’s getting into the messier bits of her experience, that made me feel like I was being held at arm’s length. At the same time, there’d a lot of stuff that would be mentioned and then set aside. For example, she was in a terrible accident with serious physical repercussions, but then it’s never mentioned it again. A couple chapters end on cliffhangers of a sort that don’t really fit the tone.
The structure just felt a little wonky to me, and it threw the pacing off. I found her narrative engaging while I was reading it, but I’m not sure what to take away with me. This is a problem I often have with memoirs, where I get the sense that the author included everything that felt significant to them without thinking about their story as a narrative structure. I’m sure it’s hard to try to boil your life down to a thesis statement, but the pat ending in particular left me scratching my head.
Still, learning about other people’s lives is interesting. Gorrindo’s prose is solid and her characterizations are compelling. She talks a lot about physical and mental health in a way that I think will be validating for a lot of people in comparable situations.
Thank you to the publisher for sending me an ARC copy. My lukewarm feelings are my own.
April 10, 2024
My husband is retired Air Force—he worked on nav-com systems on F-16s. We are parents and parents-in-law to 3 veterans and another 2 who are active duty.
In general, the Air Force is much more like a “normal job” than Combat positions in the Army. My husband never deployed; he was in a Special Duty when Desert Shield and Desert Storm kicked off and was not eligible for deployment. I’ve never forgotten his profound disappointment that he couldn’t go, despite the fact that I was pregnant with our 4th child. I couldn’t understand; I was bewildered and hurt.
Our Air Force and Army children have deployed: Afghanistan, Kuwait, The UAE, Iraq, and Syria. I’ve seen and felt firsthand the anxiety of deployment, the disruption to family, the aftermath of men being in dangerous places, living on the edge, and trying to reintegrate into family life.
This was a very good read for me, and actually helped me understand some things. However, there were things that really rubbed me the wrong way. The author has an attitude of superiority and condescension that sometimes pops out: thinking she’s better than people who grew up in small towns, don’t have college educations, or subscribe to her political beliefs. She absolutely gives an impression that she believes she’s more intelligent than the other enlisted wives; it’s extremely off putting.
She expressed surprise to discover someone was reading a book she had studied at university. What even?!
Also, there is a LOT of salty language.
I think most military wives and moms would enjoy this memoir, as long as you can look past the condescension and are willing to read criticism of political views that may or may not tally with yours.
In general, the Air Force is much more like a “normal job” than Combat positions in the Army. My husband never deployed; he was in a Special Duty when Desert Shield and Desert Storm kicked off and was not eligible for deployment. I’ve never forgotten his profound disappointment that he couldn’t go, despite the fact that I was pregnant with our 4th child. I couldn’t understand; I was bewildered and hurt.
Our Air Force and Army children have deployed: Afghanistan, Kuwait, The UAE, Iraq, and Syria. I’ve seen and felt firsthand the anxiety of deployment, the disruption to family, the aftermath of men being in dangerous places, living on the edge, and trying to reintegrate into family life.
This was a very good read for me, and actually helped me understand some things. However, there were things that really rubbed me the wrong way. The author has an attitude of superiority and condescension that sometimes pops out: thinking she’s better than people who grew up in small towns, don’t have college educations, or subscribe to her political beliefs. She absolutely gives an impression that she believes she’s more intelligent than the other enlisted wives; it’s extremely off putting.
She expressed surprise to discover someone was reading a book she had studied at university. What even?!
Also, there is a LOT of salty language.
I think most military wives and moms would enjoy this memoir, as long as you can look past the condescension and are willing to read criticism of political views that may or may not tally with yours.
April 8, 2024
I ate up my April @bookofthemonth pick in less than 24 hours 😳
This month has been super slumpy for me, and I’ve been DNF’ing about every other book I start 👀 so I was looking to read something that was a bit different from what I had been picking up. The Wives fit the bill.
Simone is newly married when her husband joins the army and the pair move south the Georgia. The new small-town is foreign to Simone who had started a life in New York. As her husband starts to deploy, Simone begins to join the only community she can: the army wives. While she struggles to find her place amongst the other women, she figures out who she likes and how to make a life for herself. The Wives follows Simone over the course of a few years and in it she writes about her struggles with the army, war, marriage, and more.
Even though this memoir is on the longer side (over 400 pages), I found it super easy to read. I enjoyed Simone’s take on her new environment and how she portrayed the toll the army took on her marriage. Additionally, I think she does a relatively solid job of conveying her own complicated emotions with the work her husband does. However, I think it could have been a bit more in depth.
Overall, if you’re looking for a fast-paced, engaging memoir, then I recommend picking this one up! Plus, I’m obsessed with the cover!
No rating - I don’t rate memoirs
#litbylillireviews
This month has been super slumpy for me, and I’ve been DNF’ing about every other book I start 👀 so I was looking to read something that was a bit different from what I had been picking up. The Wives fit the bill.
Simone is newly married when her husband joins the army and the pair move south the Georgia. The new small-town is foreign to Simone who had started a life in New York. As her husband starts to deploy, Simone begins to join the only community she can: the army wives. While she struggles to find her place amongst the other women, she figures out who she likes and how to make a life for herself. The Wives follows Simone over the course of a few years and in it she writes about her struggles with the army, war, marriage, and more.
Even though this memoir is on the longer side (over 400 pages), I found it super easy to read. I enjoyed Simone’s take on her new environment and how she portrayed the toll the army took on her marriage. Additionally, I think she does a relatively solid job of conveying her own complicated emotions with the work her husband does. However, I think it could have been a bit more in depth.
Overall, if you’re looking for a fast-paced, engaging memoir, then I recommend picking this one up! Plus, I’m obsessed with the cover!
No rating - I don’t rate memoirs
#litbylillireviews
April 8, 2024
Thank you Gallery Books/Scout Press for my #gifted copy of The Wives: A Memoir!
𝐓𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞: 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐖𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬: 𝐀 𝐌𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐢𝐫
𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫: 𝐒𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐆𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐨
𝐏𝐮𝐛 𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐞: 𝐀𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐥 𝟗, 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒
𝟓⭑
I will be the first to admit that I have no experience with military life. I was unsure how I would connect with this book, but found the premise intriguing and wanted to give it a try. Let me tell you, this book was so incredibly powerful and I am SO glad I read it. If you love memoirs, I really think this is one you will not want to miss. I almost felt like this book read more like a novel than a memoir, and I just loved how easily it flowed.
The Wives is a memoir by Simone Gorrindo, which tells the story of her experience being moved from NYC to Columbus, Georgia when her husband joins an elite Army unit. With her husband frequently deployed, Simone is often left to navigate a new world on her. That is, until she meets the wives. The Wives provides us with a unique look at sisterhood and marriage.
Gorrindo provides such a raw and honest look at her life. It truly was so eye opening for me to better understand the sacrifices military families make. This is a memoir I will never forget.
𝐓𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞: 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐖𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬: 𝐀 𝐌𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐢𝐫
𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫: 𝐒𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐆𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐨
𝐏𝐮𝐛 𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐞: 𝐀𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐥 𝟗, 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒
𝟓⭑
I will be the first to admit that I have no experience with military life. I was unsure how I would connect with this book, but found the premise intriguing and wanted to give it a try. Let me tell you, this book was so incredibly powerful and I am SO glad I read it. If you love memoirs, I really think this is one you will not want to miss. I almost felt like this book read more like a novel than a memoir, and I just loved how easily it flowed.
The Wives is a memoir by Simone Gorrindo, which tells the story of her experience being moved from NYC to Columbus, Georgia when her husband joins an elite Army unit. With her husband frequently deployed, Simone is often left to navigate a new world on her. That is, until she meets the wives. The Wives provides us with a unique look at sisterhood and marriage.
Gorrindo provides such a raw and honest look at her life. It truly was so eye opening for me to better understand the sacrifices military families make. This is a memoir I will never forget.
April 1, 2024
4.5⭐️
I didn’t really know what to expect going into this memoir. I didn’t grow up in a military family and have loved my adult life pretty far removed from that culture as well.
I instantly connected with Simone, as another outsider looking in, and thanks to that and to her excellent writing, I was able to feel everything she was feeling and experiencing right alongside her.
There’s so much I’ve never considered about military life-especially for the wives. They may not be engaging in combat, but every aspect of their lives is affected by it. And while they are tasked (often explicitly by the military, if this story is any indication) with being the support system for their oft-absent spouses, who is providing *their* support? When possible, each other.
The Wives flowed much like a novel and kept me thoroughly engaged all the way through. I’m glad I had this window into their world.
Thank you Simone Gorrindo, BookishFirst, and Gallery Books for providing this gifted copy for review consideration. All opinions expressed are my own.
I didn’t really know what to expect going into this memoir. I didn’t grow up in a military family and have loved my adult life pretty far removed from that culture as well.
I instantly connected with Simone, as another outsider looking in, and thanks to that and to her excellent writing, I was able to feel everything she was feeling and experiencing right alongside her.
There’s so much I’ve never considered about military life-especially for the wives. They may not be engaging in combat, but every aspect of their lives is affected by it. And while they are tasked (often explicitly by the military, if this story is any indication) with being the support system for their oft-absent spouses, who is providing *their* support? When possible, each other.
The Wives flowed much like a novel and kept me thoroughly engaged all the way through. I’m glad I had this window into their world.
Thank you Simone Gorrindo, BookishFirst, and Gallery Books for providing this gifted copy for review consideration. All opinions expressed are my own.
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